


Young Mistress

by azureqingge



Category: Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, MDZS, Mo Dao Zu Shi, The Founder of Diabolism, 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
Genre: Alternate Ending, Fluff, M/M, MDZS - Freeform, Mo Dao Zu Shi - Freeform, One-sided Lan Sizhui|Jin Ling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:01:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28498725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azureqingge/pseuds/azureqingge
Summary: “Who said I needed your permission to come or leave the Cloud Recesses? Who do you think you are?!”“Stop playing around! You know what I am to you!”“...”“Huh?”“Hmph. Really now? But what's the use if I’m the only one feeling this way, hm? And let me tell you. I don’t need your pity.”
Relationships: Lan Wangji|Wei Wuxian, One-sided Lan Sizhui|Jin Ling - Relationship, jiang cheng|wen ning, lan jingyi|jin ling
Comments: 4
Kudos: 38





	Young Mistress

“So, what are you gonna do? Tell your uncle? Call your dog?” Lan JingYi snaps.

Jin Ling clenches his fist, unable to answer with what’s left of his energy restraining his welling anger. Gritting his teeth, he exhales sharply, glaring at the other as if doing so would kill him.

“Let’s not fight. We can settle this like gentlemen,” Lan SiZhui interrupts, stepping in between them.

“Gentlemen? Then, how do you settle matters with a young mistress—" Lan JingYi remarks and at the same time, it was accompanied by the sharp sound of metal unsheathing.

“Is there a problem with your eyes? Want me to poke them out for you since they’re just as useless as you are?!” Jin Ling yells at him, charging towards him.

Lan SiZhui, aside from having a calm and resolute personality, was their senior for almost three years. He knew how to deal with such impulsive attacks borne of anger. He sidesteps the attack and grabs ahold of the other's wrist while also putting pressure on it. The GusuLan Sect was famous for having disciples with incredible arm strength. He dropped his sword. 

“Young Master Jin. I believe I mentioned that we could settle this with words?” he calmly says, dropping Jin Ling's wrist. 

Jin Ling picks up his sword, glaring at him as well. He thought, _I shouldn’t have participated in this night-hunt. With such amateurs like them, we’d definitely end up either empty-handed or in danger._

Lan SiZhui slowly breathes in, his gaze lowering slightly, as though Jin Ling's expression just told him exactly what the other was thinking. And he wasn’t wrong in guessing so.

Back in Yi City, the group of disciples they formed, no matter which sect, had been through life and death together. Aside from hearing from Wei WuXian how Jin Ling endured criticism from people of all ages and how he spent his days either alone or with his uncles, he couldn’t help but insist on tagging him along. He couldn’t help but reminisce how Jin Ling was the one who also helped him and Wei WuXian clean up that dirty kitchen in that God-forsaken place, even though the help wasn’t given without a few of his nasty complaints. 

Thankfully, when he brought up the idea, none of the disciples objected. In fact, they were excited as well, as if this was a long-awaited reunion of the group that survived Yi City. When no one refused the idea, there was also one who wasn’t in favour of the idea. Lan JingYi knew as much as Lan SiZhui did. He told SiZhui, Wanting to be his friend and feeling sorry for him because he has no friends are two different things. 

Despite being his best friend, he didn’t listen. And now, the two who had mutual feelings of disliking each other exploded and the argument just had no end.

Lan JingYi, easily seeing through Lan SiZhui with even the slightest shift in movement or expression, happened to catch him make a face. He glared at Jin Ling, “You! Your temper's getting worse by the second! Not once but twice did you treat SiZhui like that even though he was just being nice to you! You wouldn’t even be here if he didn’t insist on inviting you!”

“I didn’t ask to be invited!” Jin Ling blurted.

“Why you—" Lan JingYi takes an angry step forward. _He can’t even be honest with himself! If he didn’t want it, he wouldn’t have come!_

SiZhui restrains JingYi. “Let’s just get this over with. Shall we?” he changes the topic. It wasn’t that he was afraid that JingYi would take it too far with his words or his actions. For some reason, he was afraid Jin Ling would take it to heart and leave them behind. And he didn’t want him to leave just yet. After all, they belonged to different sects. Putting aside a full-blown argument to be taken care of the next day wasn’t an option since the other wasn’t easily accessible.

But Jin Ling's attention was long since caught by something else. Suddenly, a purple flash illuminated the bushes behind them before a big object came flying and crashing at the big boulder to their left.

“G—Ghost General?” one of the disciples near the crash site reaches out with a trembling hand. But it wasn’t because of Wen Ning, but rather the one who sent him flying.

Last time they saw Wen Ning and Jiang Cheng face each other, the hostility in the latter's eyes was enough to twist his handsome face into that of an ugly pile worse than a corpse's. On top of that, the way Wen Ning treated each of them with care, especially SiZhui, it was enough for one to conclude that the only scary thing about him was his appearance.

Jiang Cheng steps out from the bushes, his face a few degrees better than before. Apparently, after Wen Ning saved them from Nie MingJue, the hatred he held towards him was somewhat diluted. Lan SiZhui runs to his uncle, helping him up with both hands before, “Sect Leader Jiang—"

“I didn’t know it was him. He startled me,” Jiang Cheng answers the question before it came, retracting Zidian. He looks over at Jin Ling. Seeing how his nephew had already drawn his sword, he squints his eyes a little. “You drew your sword because you heard us fighting?”

Jin Ling, who wasn’t entirely hateful towards Wen Ning anymore, glances at him but didn’t know what he should be feeling at the moment. When Jiang Cheng directed a question at him, he didn’t know why his uncle would pay attention to such a small thing. “Huh? No.”

Jiang Cheng's expression worsened, “Then, who were you fighting with?”

At the same time, Wen Ning told SiZhui, “I’m fine.”

Lan SiZhui stood after Wen Ning wordlessly dusted off his clothes.

Jin Ling only caught up to what his uncle wanted him to answer. _Was he being bullied?_ He delayed his answer, wondering what he should make of it but in doing so, only confirmed Jiang Cheng's suspicion.

“Who was it?” his voice drips with anger.

“It was me,” Lan SiZhui answers. “We were having an argument about my leading the night-hunt.”

It was true. The argument was due to Jin Ling being absolutely displeased with how he led the group, which pissed Lan JingYi.

“SiZhui!” JingYi snaps at him for saving him.

Jiang Cheng raises a brow, his instinct drawing his attention to the right person. “Really? It wasn’t this one?” he stares pointedly at JingYi.

He could’ve just said he drew his sword at whatever was dwelling inside the cave they were about to enter. Or he could’ve just made excuses or whatever. But Jin Ling made a quick decision. There was no hiding it. Only redirecting it. The way SiZhui begged with his eyes, it was clear that he didn’t want him to rat JingYi out. The other boys didn’t dare interfere.

Jin Ling knew he had to redirect a charging bull to a sturdier tree, one who could handle its force. And he knew between the two, Lan SiZhui was more than capable of placating Jiang Cheng. He could talk his way out of this one. _Just this once. He’s not that big of an idiot to be unable to handle my uncle._

“Lan SiZhui calls himself the leader, but look at how he does things,” Jin Ling starts, not directly answering his question. “Anyway, I drew my sword to show them who’s boss. It’s not like they’re much of a threat.”

Lan JingYi stomps towards him but Wen Ning was quick, stepping in front of him. “That young mistress! Who does he think he is?! Always making trouble for others as soon as his temper calls for it!” he blurts out.

“Shh—calm down,” Wen Ning pats his shoulders. He avoided talking too much and his voice was a whisper, almost afraid that Jiang Cheng would hear him.

The way Jin Ling arrogantly chose his words caused Jiang Cheng's mistaken suspicion of him being bullied to dissipate. It was reasonable, though. Jin Ling being invited meant the boys didn’t dislike him. SiZhui took a breath of relief but JingYi took it the wrong way and forgot that he just escaped from Jiang Cheng's fury, only to say something that might ignite the flames again. Jiang Cheng, on the other hand, didn’t know whether to lash out or laugh. After all, it was not only true, but it came from his own mouth as well that Jin Ling has a temper of a young mistress. That whenever he chides him, he was always quick to run away and put himself in danger, leaving him in a frenzied panic.

As Jin Ling's uncle and current sect leader of the YunmengJiang sect, he had to feign anger to at least give his nephew some face. He managed to put up an angry face, his voice low, “Watch it.”

JingYi felt electricity run up his spine, immediately shutting his mouth. Lan SiZhui speaks up, “Sect Leader Jiang, I’ve been meaning to ask. What brings you here?”

It was Jiang Cheng's turn to turn speechless. His eyes steal a glance at Jin Ling, who was now raising an eyebrow at him. He decides to use his position instead, “What I came here for has nothing to do with you.”

“Are you following me?” Jin Ling clicks his tongue.

Before Jiang Cheng could answer, everyone's faces changed. A huge amount of dark energy emerged from within the cave, and it was coming fast! The killing intent was abnormally huge. The boys backed away from the cave.

Lan SiZhui draws his sword, instructing the boys to surround the cave at a distance. Wen Ning was on guard as he steps forward in front of the boys. Jiang Cheng's face twists but whether Wen Ning or the creatures that were about to come out have caused it was unknown. With a flick of his wrist, Zidian turns to a whip with purple sparks snaking around it.

“Work in pairs!” SiZhui shouts, reminding them of his tactics earlier on. After all, attacking in pairs would be safer and easier. If one would distract the prey, one could attack and disable it. If one was injured, there definitely would be a person to carry him away from danger while the remaining would continue.

It wasn’t that Lan SiZhui didn’t know Jin Ling would be displeased with this. Even though there was no ill-will between the boys and him, of course they weren’t so close as to offer partnership with Jin Ling. There were many factors to consider. First, no one would dare because of his temper. Also, no one knew if he’d even accept the offer. Most of the disciples from the sects weren’t alone, so it was understood that those who came with their friends would be partners already. Jin Ling was the only one who came from the LanlingJin sect. Jin Ling's suggestion was to just let the strong ones attack while the others wait or just set up an array or something. SiZhui values the lives and well-being of the people he leads. As much as possible, he didn’t want anyone to return even with a single scratch so he plans meticulously to guide everyone beforehand.

He thought of all this ahead of time and being a tactful person, he spent time just to come up with a solution. He was planning to ask Jin Ling to be partners with him. There were a few disciples from the GusuLan sect, all of which Lan JingYi had good relations. Leaving him behind just this once would pose no problem at all. Even if there would be adjustments overall, it should’ve been fine since the rest of the disciples get along well.

Jin Ling would definitely be thorny about it at first but he wouldn’t refuse. He wouldn’t admit it but it is indeed nice to make friends with one's peers and now would be a good chance when someone outright put the plate in front so one wouldn’t have to ask out of embarrassment. JingYi added firewood to the flame though, like he usually does, making it hard for SiZhui to put it out.

After a few moments, Jiang Cheng was almost sure he could hear growls and hisses in the cave, hidden in its shadow.

“It’s here,” Jin Ling grips the hilt of his sword tight.

“Not… it,” SiZhui's eyes widen.

“Why isn’t it coming out?” a disciple steps forward when Jiang Cheng tells him to back off.

“There are… two of them?” Jiang Cheng speaks, barely making out two pairs of faintly glowing eyes. “Do not act rashly!” he commands. A heavy weight settles in his chest, almost as if it was telling him not to attack first.

Lan SiZhui put the pieces together. The killing intent was extremely huge, while the dark energy was the amount of two average monsters combined. From the looks of it, a mid-level cultivator could kill them but how come they couldn’t? Unless… there was something about the monsters that they didn’t know put them at a disadvantage.

“SiZhui!” ZiZhen calls his attention. His eyes sweep briefly around them, sensing the increasing dark energy. They were surrounded by corpses, ones probably eaten by the monsters and others attracted by the dark energy.

_Senior Wei might’ve come in handy but he and HanGuang-Jun are already dealing with a more serious matter somewhere else._

Still sticking to the plan, the others set on wiping out the corpses. The monsters lunged out of the cave, seeing the scattering disciples. Jiang Cheng shouted, “Jin Ling! Arrows!”

SiZhui no longer had the time to pay attention to him. As he ran, he glanced once at Jiang Cheng. As their eyes met, SiZhui nodded at the unspoken order. They each had to handle one of the beasts. “JingYi!” he shouted. JingYi sent out his talismans, while maintaining the space between them. Sneaking up behind the monster, SiZhui charges with his sword with swift movements. The bull-like beast suddenly changes course towards him. SiZhui was experienced. He jumps and avoids the bull, using its back to kick away farther. The monster knew some of their attacks and knew what magical tools to avoid. _This might be how the cultivators lost. They didn’t know and weren’t prepared for it._

“The monster is intelligent, be careful!” he shouts. As if hearing him, it attacks again but Wen Ning comes out from nowhere, landing on the monster with such force that it created a crater with rocks flying everywhere. SiZhui sees this as a chance and sends out a talisman to keep it from fighting its way out of Wen Ning.

With Wen Ning's help, they managed to kill the monster. Just as SiZhui turns back to help the two, he hears a whooping sound of an arrow released. Jiang Cheng was in mid air, pushing with him to the side a disciple who was frozen in fear. The monster changes course, smelling the blood of its twin and the arrow misses its target, piercing through Jiang Cheng's ankle instead. The two drop on the ground. The disciple, one of the GusuLan sect's, stares at Jiang Cheng in horror. Jin Ling screams, “Uncle!”

The creature stops. There were two possible reasons. One was because it was smart and could tell its twin was dead, with escaping as the easier thing to do rather than mourn. The other was that, no matter how smart it was, it was still a monster. And a monster that smells human blood loses all its wits and would crave for it instead.

Sensing a foreboding danger, Jiang Cheng whips his head in Jin Ling's direction. Seeing him frantically running, he threatens helplessly, “Get that brat away from me or I’ll kill all of you myself!”

At that moment, what Jiang Cheng feared the most was losing Jin Ling and at the same time, getting himself killed to leave his nephew alone all over again, to be picked on by those waiting in the dark to snatch the throne from him.

A boy from another sect grabs ahold of Jin Ling. The one Jiang Cheng saved comes back to his senses, picking him up by locking Jiang Cheng's arms with his, he pulls him as far as his feet could allow. It was obvious that this disciple was one of the inferior ones, if compared to SiZhui and JingYi.

“Stupid brat, run!” Jiang Cheng writhes out of his grasp, pushing him as far as he could, while also trying to stand. He stands but does not run. Zidian's light was slowly dimming, so he pulls Sandu out as well.

_I can’t leave Jin Ling yet. Once I die, the snakes will devour him before the day ends._

The monster was close and Jiang Cheng attacks with Zidian first. But the monster accelerates and hits Jiang Cheng to the ground, stomping at him. The first stomp was a miss, but the second one hits him on the shoulder. He grimaces in pain but manages to strike with Sandu.

The rest of the disciples were busy with their own battles, some having difficulties due to their low cultivation levels. Jin Ling punches the one holding him, running to his uncle, only to be caught by a stronger grip. Lan JingYi was holding his wrist.

SiZhui and Wen Ning were on their way, running side by side. Jin Ling screams, “Get out of my way!”

“You will only get in the way, let SiZhui handle this,” Lan JingYi says, making it clear that he wasn’t doing this to mess with him. Now was not the time.

Jin Ling shakes his arm violently, but it wouldn’t budge. He puts his hand on the hilt of his sword but JingYi sees through him and snatches his wrist. He subdues him by holding both his arms behind his back.

“Let me go! If you have a problem with me, now is not the time! Let me save my uncle first!” Jin Ling resists.

As SiZhui and Wen Ning prepare to attack, the monster senses them. It moved its foot from Jiang Cheng's shoulder to stomp at his left leg. Jiang Cheng shouts in pain, cursing at it. The next thing was unexpected. It bit into Jiang Cheng's leg, and dragged him inside the cave.

“Sect Leader Jiang!” SiZhui runs faster, but Wen Ning halts him.

JingYi froze, seeing Jiang Cheng disappear into the cave, and lets Jin Ling wriggle out of his grasp. He, then, feels a force on his left cheek, before he staggers backwards.

“Damn you—" Jin Ling grits his teeth, pulling back his fist to punch him again when two disciples who just finished their business stop him. “I already begged you! What do you want?! Now, my uncle's in there!”

Wen Ning instructs SiZhui quickly. “I’ll come back with Sect Leader Jiang. The rest depends on you.” Leaving those words behind, he propels himself to the cave.

“Everyone, stay away from the cave!” he shouts, assisting the rest of them with the remaining corpses.

Jin Ling manages to escape the two, running towards the cave. Lan JingYi follows him and spreads his arms across to block his way. “SiZhui said no one should go in.”

“Are you expecting me to stand around while my uncle gets eaten?! Get out of my way or I’ll kill you!” Jin Ling points Suihua's tip at his chest.

“Wen Ning will return with your uncle alive. You’ll only make a mess of things if you go in there!” JingYi stands his ground.

SiZhui walks over to the commotion, “Young Master Jin, everything will be fine. Please put down your sword. My uncle will—"

“And what if he returns with my uncle dead?! What then?!” Jin Ling drops Suihua, collapsing to the ground. His head was lowered but one could tell he was crying due to his voice and the sniffling.

Lan JingYi, who never liked him, was hit hard. Even though his jaw hurt and his mouth bled at the corner, he couldn’t bring himself to spit curses at him or be mad at him. He might be too noisy and snappy at times, but he understood.

Jin Ling had no parents. Recently, his uncle on his father's side, Jin Guangyao, whom he also loved, betrayed him and was killed at Guanyin Temple. If he were to lose Jiang Cheng now, he would have no one left. Just thinking about it was terrifying enough.

SiZhui clenches the hilt of his sword, unable to do anything. Then, he hears a noise. Looking up, he sees Lan JingYi with his knees on the ground, directly in front of Jin Ling. His eyes widen in shock when JingYi reaches out and envelops Jin Ling in an embrace.

“Huh?” Jin Ling dizzily blinks, trying to turn his head. JingYi doesn’t say anything. His expression was dark and sad and the only one who could see was SiZhui.

Jin Ling surprisingly did not resist. He lays his chin on JingYi's shoulder and lets out the remainder of his tears. It was a stark contrast. This boy had never done anything but to annoy him and not even half an hour had passed since he punched him, yet now, he was taking comfort in his arms. The fear he felt somewhat dissipated.

A while later, Wen Ning emerges from the cave with Jiang Cheng on his back, unconscious. Jin Ling springs up and runs toward the two.

“Uncle!” he calls.

“He’s still unconscious,” Wen Ning says, laying him down on the ground, “His injuries need immediate medical attention.”

Just then, two figures appear, with distinct silhouettes. Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi. They saw the signal firelight a disciple lit up under SiZhui's order. Seeing the mess and eventually, Jiang Cheng who was lying unconscious on the ground with his leg and ankle bleeding, Wei WuXian runs over.

“What happened?” Wei WuXian asks calmly, quickly checking Jiang Cheng's vitals.

Wen Ning briefly explains Jiang Cheng's situation first. Lan WangJi retrieves something from his sleeve and pours the contents in Jiang Cheng's mouth. Then, he presses an acupuncture point at his ankle to stop the bleeding.

“He needs to be taken back,” Wei WuXian rips a piece of his clothing and wraps it around the bleeding ankle. Then, he does the same for the holes in Jiang Cheng's leg. “As for the shoulder, he might be bleeding inside.”

Shortly after, Jiang Cheng was taken back to the Cloud Recesses, which was the nearest and safest place from that site.

“Young Master Jin,” a soft voice calls him. Jin Ling jerks his head to the side, his eyes meeting a young man in white robes.

“Oh. It's you,” he responds succinctly. He quickly turns away. Strangely, he feels a tinge of disappointment, though he himself could not admit it. It was the same white robes, the same forehead ribbon… but the face did not belong to the one who gave him the warmth of an embrace and a sense of safety when he thought he was a hair's width from losing everything.

Lan SiZhui approaches one step at a time, “May I sit beside you?” he asks gently.

“Hmph,” Jin Ling answers with a scoff, which pretty much meant he could do whatever he wanted. Somehow, he told himself that if the gentle one was here, the noisy one would appear sooner or later.

Lan SiZhui understood, keeping a feet's space between them. He smiles, “Young Master Jin, I came here when I saw you climb up. Are you not pleased with your room? If you want, I can—"

“It’s not that,” Jin Ling stops him sharply.

“Is something troubling you?” SiZhui leans a bit closer to peer at his face. Worried that Jin Ling was still shaken from almost losing his uncle, he watched him closely and before he knew it, ended up overdoing it. He had no friends and on top of that, the only one in his kin who truly cared about him was in critical condition on a bed, yet to wake up. In short, he could only endure things on his own.

It was his job to look after the younger ones and offer them whatever he can regardless if they were asking for it or not. And knowing Jin Ling from the times they were together, he already assumed he'd refuse the comfort since he didn’t want anyone to see him as a weakling.

“Why are you being so nosy? Who are you to ask such questions? Just so you know, I’m under no obligation to answer any of them,” Jin Ling says, his tone impatient as if he wanted to end the conversation quickly. He needed the time alone because aside from his uncle being in a coma, a missing somebody kept on popping inside his head.

SiZhui wasn’t surprised but still looks around, afraid his best friend would hear them and start a fire again. Confirming the area was clear, he switches to a different approach. Dealing with people of all sorts of personality was his specialty after all.

“Then, I will stop asking,” SiZhui says with the same gentle demeanour. “Sect Leader Jiang is out of danger. All we have to do is wait for him to wake up.”

“You think I know any lesser than you? If you’re going to say such useless things, you might as well shut up,” Jin Ling glares at him.

SiZhui sighs inwardly. When times were bad, Jin Ling was most irritable. “Sorry,” he mumbles, not knowing what else to say.

Jin Ling stops swinging his leg that was hanging off the wall. He was accustomed to saying such mean things but ever since Wei WuXian gave him that little piece of advice about saying cringe-worthy stuff, he always finds himself reflecting upon his words right after they leave his mouth, even if he knew everyone understood him as just that kind of person and that it was normal. Moreover, the one sitting beside him had been nothing but nice to him. There were only limited people who chose to be genuinely nice to him. Returning the favour and not making an enemy of them was the right thing to do.

“It’s nothing,” he says, choosing not to apologize.

But even though he didn’t, it was more than enough for Lan SiZhui. He smiles, “Tomorrow, we’ll be receiving our punishment. It is almost nine. You should rest.”

“I know,” Jin Ling says flatly.

“Young Master Jin, I do believe you were not wrong when you expressed your opinions earlier. No matter how unpleasant the things people say to you, you have already proved them wrong by doing what you think is right,” SiZhui says.

“How can you know? I had no parents to raise me,” Jin Ling says bitterly, repeating the words that he heard countless times from people who thought of it as a qualification to do or be worth anything.

Lan SiZhui whips his head to him, not expecting Jin Ling to say something personal. “Young Master Jin—"

Fearing he'd apologize or worse, feel pity towards him, Jin Ling immediately changes the subject, “Jin RuLan. Or Jin Ling. Whatever just don’t call me that. It's too long, don’t you get tired of it?”

Lan SiZhui did not know whether to laugh or tell him to get back. He lets out a gentle laugh, “Jin Ling, I was going to ask you to be my partner when I was giving everyone instructions.”

Jin Ling was shocked. _Me? As his partner?_ He looked over at SiZhui, who was smiling brightly at him, his features illuminated by the moonlight. “What about that noisy little brat of yours?”

The smile on SiZhui's face was replaced by a slight surprise, “Did you mean JingYi? He can manage without me.”

Jin Ling feels a tingling in his chest. Going as far as to leave his friend's side and walk a few steps back to assist a stingy person like him deserved his gratitude. He didn’t know how SiZhui could even approach first and try to talk to him. If he couldn’t apologize for treating him badly, he should at least thank him. “Thanks,” he mumbles.

SiZhui catches the word. But he wanted Jin Ling to muster the courage to say it properly, so he leans over, “Did you say something?”

_Damned cut-sleeve! This is all your fault!_

Traces of him cursing Wei WuXian and the embarrassment of having expressed a word that comes across as strange because it came out of his mouth appear on his cheeks in a light shade of pink. What was more irritating was that despite his efforts, the person didn’t even hear it! “Look at you! Not even paying attention to what others are saying! It’s not my fault you weren’t listening carefully. I’ve said my piece and I’m not going to repeat it again.”

Lan SiZhui was about to say what he wanted to happen but thought better of it. If he was going to say it now, Jin Ling might just cut off his tongue with his sword, so instead, he smiles to himself. “Forgive me,” he looks at the moon, “We should retire for the night. I will take you to your room.”

“I can go there myself! It’s not like I’m some girl who needs an escort,” Jin Ling stands but strangely, he doesn’t leave like he was waiting.

Lan SiZhui blinks for a split second, realizing what he just said. He stands as well, “Our night-hunt was ruined because of my incompetence and for that, I apologize. Also, I missed my chance to team up with you,” he chuckles, his expression almost saying that it was indeed a shame.

“What?” Jin Ling crosses his arms, his tone indifferent. “Won’t there be a next time?”

This time, Lan SiZhui couldn’t believe what he heard. He turns his head slowly, studying Jin Ling's side profile. He has smooth, fair skin, with long lashes trembling against the areas under his eyes, which were closed in irritation. His nose also had a high bridge. Recalling how he offered to take Jin Ling to his room and perhaps, how JingYi refers to him as well, made him feel some kind of needle pierce through his heart.

He murmurs, “Young Master—"

“Ah, forget it! I’m tired of talking to you,” Jin Ling jumps down the wall and sprints off.

They were going to be punished tomorrow. Letting him off just this once for running around should be okay since he was going through a lot. He walks off in another direction. He let Jin Ling break a rule but he wasn’t about to break it himself.

Finally letting out a sigh, he inwardly scolds Lan JingYi for calling Jin Ling 'young mistress' whether he was there or not, blaming it for how he acted… and felt when he was asked that question, the effect which Jin Ling was apparently unaware of.

_Just now… I thought he looked pretty…_

With the punishment that was awaiting them in the afternoon, Lan SiZhui and Lan JingYi woke up earlier than usual, sharing their sentiments on the matter. There was still time. Lan QiRen and the others will be back in the afternoon after they speak to the respective sects that were involved, and what punishment they’d issue to the disciples.

Walking together to the back to feed Lan WangJi’s rabbits, JingYi grumbles, “Why would they punish us? It wasn’t our fault the monsters were smart and Sect Leader Jiang injured himself! If anything, they should just blame it on that junior and punish him alone. Who in their right mind would space out in front of a charging prey?”

“JingYi, someone might hear you,” SiZhui looks around. “Do not talk about others behind their backs. Come on, it’s not like he wanted the accident to happen.”

“Hmph,” JingYi gives up. This friend of his was too kind for his own good. Usually, he’d argue for a long time, but this time, a sect leader was injured and SiZhui had a lot on his mind, so he let it be. He places a hand on his chin, thinking about something else.

“Oh. Young Master Jin—” SiZhui murmurs, seeing Jin Ling walking a few steps ahead, but doesn’t say anything else, remembering that Jin Ling hated how he addressed him.

SiZhui gives JingYi a pat on the shoulder before briskly walking towards Jin Ling, who turned around before he could touch him. “Lan Yuan.” He says in a flat tone.

“Good morning,” Lan SiZhui smiles. “You are up early.”

“I couldn’t sleep.” Jin Ling continues to walk ahead. Out of nowhere he glances at his side before SiZhui's, with impressively small movements. It was oddly empty.

Still, SiZhui tilts his head, “Are you looking for something?” he asks.

Jin Ling flinches, almost unnoticeably, immediately directing his gaze in front. Brows twitching in annoyance, he replies curtly, “No.”

“Um, I came to tell you something about the punishment so you would be prepared. Usually, they make us do handstands while copying scriptures,” Lan SiZhui tells him, worried he didn’t know.

“Handstands? While copying scriptures?!” Jin Ling gasps, stopping and turning to him. “That’s ridiculous! I thought you guys only copy an impossible number of scriptures!”

JingYi looks up from a trance, noticing the space SiZhui left when he hears a familiar voice, “Hey!” he waves like a toddler, “How are you feeling?” he smiles brightly at Jin Ling, walking a bit faster to catch up to them.

Jin Ling slowly turned his head behind him. When his eyes landed on JingYi's smiling face, he felt his body become stiff, both his cheeks and chest catching fire. Annoyed at his uncontrollable reaction and afraid it will show through his complexion, he turns around and sprints off.

JingYi’s eyes almost turn white, hand still hanging in the air, “Wha—that brat! I was just trying to be nice! I didn’t even call him young mistress this time! And running is forbidden in the Cloud Recesses!”

“JingYi, he’s going through a rough time. Sect Leader Jiang just woke up,” SiZhui holds his shoulder, afraid he’d run after Jin Ling and spout the rule in his face.

“Whatever! Looks like he wants me to keep calling him that way,” JingYi crosses his arms, “Shouldn’t he be happy Sect Leader Jiang finally woke up?”

“Well, you see, Sect Leader Jiang is in bad shape. It looks like his movements will be limited for a while,” Lan SiZhui sighs. The rest of what that fact would have in effect need not be said.

Upon summoning, Lan SiZhui and everyone involved in the night-hunt kneel as they face Lan QiRen's wrath. Aside from returning to the Cloud Recesses in that state, he wondered how on earth did they involve the YunmengJiang sect Leader and carry him back half-dead!

Lan XiChen was there to somehow help the disciples explain their part. The disciple who spelled trouble was after all, from their sect. However, Lan SiZhui shouldered most of the consequences. Being the leader, he believed that every disciple was his responsibility. Had Jiang Cheng and Wen Ning not been there, who knows what would’ve happened. Trying to fix the mess he'd done, he attempts to speak up when SiZhui's glare holds his tongue.

Jin Ling was obviously displeased with it. But this wasn’t his sect and he would not dare initiate a talk with Lan QiRen to save somebody's ass. Waiting for his uncle to wake up, then letting him do the talking was the safest option.

Lan QiRen, blinded by rage and humiliation, declared that aside from the punishment the GusuLan sect would implement upon its disciples, after Jiang Cheng recovers, they would also be left to his judgment. Lan XiChen, out of respect for his uncle and Jiang Cheng, sadly agrees, but he managed to talk him out of using the disciple whip. No one complained because each thought they had a share of the blame and SiZhui already took most of it. Who are they to complain? For three months, they were banned from night-hunting. It was agreed that the rest would be sent home to receive their punishment there. Jin Ling, however, remained with the rest as his uncle was still under the GusuLan sect's wing. Being the temporary sect leader of his clan, it was understood that he was to take his punishment here at Gusu.

“Lan Zhan, do you think they’d be okay? That looks like a pain,” Wei WuXian couldn’t bring himself to laugh. Jiang Cheng was seriously injured after all.

Lan WangJi looks over at the disciples, supporting themselves with one hand while writing with the other. SiZhui especially had a big stack of papers, a layer of sweat covered his forehead, slightly darkening his forehead ribbon at the edges. He doesn’t answer Wei WuXian. How could he know that _all_ of them would be okay?

Instead, he approaches the line of boys, glancing at their papers until he stops at one. Lifting a paper, his eyes briefly swept over.

“H—HanGuang-Jun…” the boy mumbles, the ends of his forehead ribbon in his mouth.

“Rewrite,” Lan WangJi saying that one word summarizes his work. _Terrible._

Lan JingYi could only reply in vain, “Yes, HanGuang-Jun.”

If not for how Lan SiZhui had an extra stack of papers, he’d long be finished. JingYi, on the other hand, had to rewrite a few of his finished works. Jin Ling glances at both of them. His punishment was a little different because he was allowed to take intervals, but he wasn’t anywhere near progress even as he used the wall to support himself. What can he do? He was never punished like this before. Doing handstands, that much he can do. But to do it with one hand while writing with the other was a different story.

Lan SiZhui was concentrating so much that he didn’t even notice, even as a small curse escapes Jin Ling’s mouth. JingYi stops, turning his head and about to spout a rule. He frowns, before he glances once at the surroundings. Then, he lets his legs down and walks over to Jin Ling.

The latter had already raised both legs, but when he puts his weight on one hand, the other leg hits the ground. JingYi grabs that leg and raises it up.

“What the—what are you doing?!” Jin Ling shouts at him.

“Shh—you! Why are you so noisy?! Noise is forbidden in the Cloud Recesses!” he spits.

SiZhui finally notices them. “JingYi! What are you doing?”

“Helping him! If Sir comes back and sees him not doing anything, he would think he’s fooling around!” JingYi straightens Jin Ling’s legs.

Having been touched without permission, Jin Ling couldn’t concentrate at all, feeling naked and exposed. He kicks his legs around. “I don’t need your help! Don’t touch me!”

JingYi’s arm strength fails him. “SiZhui, get back to writing. And you! Do you want HanGuang-Jun to catch you instead? I’ll help you find your balance but do the rest on your own.”

“Young—Jin Ling, try to remove your other hand,” SiZhui tries to help.

Gritting his teeth in defeat at the mention of Lan WangJi, he obeys. JingYi, “I’m letting go now.” Jin Ling’s legs fall. He breathes sharply, embarrassed that he couldn’t do it the first time. “Again,” JingYi says, and Jin Ling raises his legs, letting him catch them.

Jin Ling's face was already so hot, bright red in colour. Lan JingYi catches it, but takes no notice of what it meant, as he frowns, thinking, What kind of training does the LanlingJin sect implement for him to be unable to handle this much? He looks like he's already tired, as red as a tomato.

The second time, it worked due to Jin Ling's determination to get his hands off him. JingYi goes back to his place, resuming his work like nothing happened, while the other’s eyes remain on him. He tears his gaze away, Who would have thought that this noisy brat would be nice out of the blue? And he didn’t even ask for thanks.

“Lan Yuan,” Jin Ling calls in a quiet voice, switching to some other topic to throw his attention.

Even though he only called one person, two heads turned to look at him. SiZhui, “Is there a problem, Jin Ling?”

“Why did you not let them speak? Summarizing everything in two sentences did not explain anything to the elders. But it did put all the blame on you,” Jin Ling says slowly. He didn’t even have to look at the room behind them to let SiZhui know who he was talking about.

Lan JingYi purses his lips, silently agreeing with him. The first sentence Lan SiZhui said earlier was an apology, saying everything was his fault. The second one was that of accepting whatever his punishment was.

“How can you call yourself righteous when you don’t let the person responsible for such a mess face the consequences himself? No matter how you look at it, it’s the same as letting the criminal get away,” Jin Ling continues after a moment of SiZhui staying silent. “Plus, they had the right to know what really happened. Even if they didn’t ask.”

“He’s right, SiZhui,” says JingYi.

SiZhui smiles, “We were going to be punished anyway. I’m the leader. If I did better, it wouldn’t have come to this.” Just as he went back to work, he thought, But that would look like I was just making excuses, wouldn’t it?

“SiZhui! Stop hogging all the blame. It wasn’t your fault that he couldn’t overcome his personal issues!” JingYi looks at him with sad eyes.

Jin Ling observes him. A flicker of something flashing in his eyes before disappearing. “Being the leader means sharing the burden of the group, not taking all of it. And it also means, to be responsible for each member, no matter what, you have to give them the credits they deserve, whether for reward or punishment. What happened was a group error. You wouldn’t be punished like this if you just said everything.”

Lan SiZhui's smile disappears. What Jin Ling said was indeed meaningful. He was too preoccupied with protecting the people he led that he forgot the other things he needed to protect as well. His own rights and his group members' characters.

“I never thought you could say something sensible,” JingYi grins, about to laugh.

Jin Ling glares at JingYi with red cheeks, “Shut up.”

JingYi chuckles, “But you said 'them'. Who’s the other one?”

Jin Ling, “You two were busy so you only saw my uncle when he was on the ground. That disciple wasn’t the only one at fault. There’s this one who accidentally shot his ankle.”

“Oh. So, there were two of them who were responsible,” JingYi nods in acknowledgement.

Having finished his quota for the day, Jin Ling visits his uncle the same afternoon they received their verdict. Usually, he was alone, wandering the Cloud Recesses as everyone either had work to do. Even though his uncle woke up, he was asleep most of the day. Lan WangJi and Wei WuXian told him they would come to visit and play a song for him to help him heal, even though Wei WuXian was the only one who spoke.

When he arrived, Lan WangJi and Wei WuXian were already there, in the middle of playing a calm, soothing tune. Jin Ling stops, salutes, and walks back the way he came, deciding it would be best to not interfere or be seen.

As he walked around, he decides to go to town. He had never been in Gusu before. Half of his years was spent on Lanling and the other on Yunmeng. He never expected the food to be this terrible, but he did hear a thing or two from his uncle's stories.

After buying some food in town, he makes his way back, careful not to let anyone see him with it, knowing it might be rude. He makes it to his uncle's room before curfew and settles the box on the table.

“Uncle,” he gently taps Jiang Cheng's shoulder.

Jiang Cheng's eyes slowly open and roams the ceiling, before he turns his head. When he sees Jin Ling, he scrambles to get up.

“Careful,” Jin Ling guides him to a sitting position. “You haven’t eaten since last night.”

“How long was I out?” Jiang Cheng asks, putting a hand on his head in pain.

“Since just last night, when we arrived,” Jin Ling says, reaching for the box, “The food here is terrible. I know you wouldn’t like it.”

“Where—" Jiang Cheng trails off. He'd seen this structure before. And the food was terrible. Judging from the location of the night-hunt before, it was only obvious they’d be in the Cloud Recesses.

“So you know,” Jin Ling says, handing him the box. “Eat up.”

Jiang Cheng takes the box, raising a brow. Before, he'd often go out with Wei WuXian to eat but he wasn’t that same boy. He could eat the food here, for the sake of showing respect. Speaking of, How is Wei WuXian doing? Now that he’s living with Lan WangJi?

“You already missed dinner so I bought that,” Jin Ling explains. Upon confirmation, Jiang Cheng slowly digs in. “Uncle… what happened in the cave?”

Jiang Cheng pauses, “I just woke up and you ask me in the middle of eating, you stupid brat. And don’t you go running straight to danger or else no more night-hunts for you.”

“They already banned us from night-hunting for months—" Jin Ling stops himself from talking back or it will really be his last time.

But thankfully, Jiang Cheng was more curious at the person who gave their punishment. “Who?”

“Lan QiRen and Sect Leader Lan, along with the other sects involved,” Jin Ling answers. “We were punished because you got injured and because…” he trails off.

Jiang Cheng didn’t have to press further. As soon as Jin Ling paused, he knew who he meant. He continued eating, trying to recall the hazy fragments in the cave before he passed out. _How did I get out?_ He asked the question, but when he thought of a possible answer, his brows twitch, Of course, Wen Ning got me out. It’s impossible the juniors could’ve handled that monster.

“Uncle?” Jin Ling leans, peering closer at Jiang Cheng's pallor.

“I’m done,” Jiang Cheng says quietly, handing back the box with half the food still remaining.

Jin Ling didn’t pose any objections, Maybe he doesn’t have an appetite? He just woke up. As he finished putting away the box, he clutched his sword and climbs on the sofa near the foot of Jiang Cheng's bed. Hugging Suihua tightly to his chest, he closes his eyes.

Jiang Cheng frowns, “Why are you sleeping here? Go back to your room.”

Jin Ling answers, “I’m going to guard you in case you need anything.”

“You’ve already caused me enough trouble as it is! Let me sleep in peace! Get out!” Jiang Cheng spits.

At the sound of Jiang Cheng's angry voice, Jin Ling shoots to his feet, glaring at him, “After I brought you dinner, this is what I get?! Fine! If you need anything, don’t come ordering me around!” he stomps out of the room.

He watches his nephew go. It wasn’t that he didn’t want him to sleep in the same room. In fact, he didn’t mind. As soon as Jin Ling left, Jiang Cheng puts his face on his hands. Then, stands and walks a few steps to test his ankle. The good thing about Jiang Cheng's unhealthy competitiveness is that a pain of this level was something he could endure, if it meant gaining the thing he badly wanted. Plus, the wound was healing quickly thanks to the people working on it, which Jiang Cheng didn’t know of.

Peeking at the corridors, he finds no one. It was already past 9 PM. Jiang Cheng walks briskly towards the entrance of the Cloud Recesses with only one thought in mind, I need to know…

He stands quietly, as if waiting for something or someone to emerge from the shadows. Since he didn’t have a jade token on him, he couldn’t go out and seek it himself.

“Come out,” he says quietly.

Soon, a figure materializes from the shadows. Wen Ning stands opposite him, with the barrier separating them.

As the days for the punishment near their end, so do the number of scriptures they had to copy. SiZhui had long finished his, leaving JingYi and Jin Ling in the hallways.

One afternoon, SiZhui and JingYi were out in town. The latter, as usual, grumbles along the way while the former happily listens and laughs at him from time to time, before a nearby stall pulls his attention.

“Hm? Why are you suddenly interested in those?” JingYi elbows him after briefly peering at the things the shop sells.

Lan SiZhui picks up a hairpin and examines its glassy feature. He raises it up and the sunlight hits it, reflecting a rainbow-like appearance. A smile makes its way across his lips as he imagines the hairpin on a certain someone. “I’m going to give it to someone.”

“Who, though? How is it possible when you barely had the time to meet or interact with maidens without me knowing? So, who is it?” JingYi grins, feeling his excitement welling but blinks when he realizes something. It wasn’t only SiZhui. Due to all the busy times that happened ever since Dafan mountain, meeting girls was indeed a scarcity.

“Haha—" SiZhui laughs quietly, but not at JingYi. He stares at the hairpin in his hand, his heart racing. A question finally pops in his head, Why would I give something like this to him? Am I mad?

He debates whether to put it back when Lan JingYi picks up a hairpin as well, “Hm? This would look nice on him.”

It was a beautiful hairpin as well. It was clear glass with very thin, glittery swirling streaks of white and gold inside it all the way to the thick end. Examining it carefully, he raises it up, as though he was putting it on an invisible person.

Then, he bursts into laughter, as if he just thought of a joke that was not only extremely funny but absolutely ridiculous as well.

“Him?” SiZhui asks, feeling a strange weight of worry and nervousness in his chest.

“Who else? The young mistress. This would look nice on him. Excuse me, may I have this?” Lan JingYi fishes for his money pouch and pays the shopkeeper.

Lan SiZhui was dumbstruck, mouth slightly gaping open. He didn’t even think they’d be picking something together, only to give it to the same person. But he knew whatever JingYi’s intention, it was anything but nice, given how he laughed earlier. No matter how one looked at it, it felt ominous. Lan JingYi, despite being easily angered, impulsive, and quick to throw insults as soon as he receives them, was still serious like him. He had never done anything with the sole purpose of making fun of someone nor was he fond of mischief. But what JingYi was doing now… was only something Wei WuXian would do.

SiZhui seizes his wrist, “JingYi, you cannot give things to people to make fun of them,” he says in a chiding but somewhat gentle tone.

JingYi frowns, “But he's leaving soon. What’s wrong with giving him a souvenir?”

“JingYi, I am serious. You will not only offend the LanlingJin sect leader, but also Sect Leader Jiang,” SiZhui sighs.

“Young Master,” a voice calls him. When SiZhui turns around, a rectangular box was presented to him, along with its price. It was the clear glass hairpin that reflected a rainbow.

Gulping, he reaches for his money pouch, thinking JingYi wouldn’t be the only one offending both sects. He wasn’t planning on really buying it when he thought about who he was giving it to but now that it was packed for him, he could only pay it so as not to cause trouble for the shopkeeper. After thanking the shopkeeper, they leave the stall and head back.

“Why would you give him things like that?” SiZhui asks curiously. Then, his lips twitch, remembering he was asking himself the same question moments ago.

“Well, first, he is a young mistress. Second. Look,” JingYi opens the lid of the box, bringing it closer to SiZhui to examine. “Don’t you think these streaks represent the LanlingJin sect and the GusuLan sect?”

“Why the hairpin? You could’ve given him something else,” SiZhui presses.

“Well, it was the first thing I saw that looked like a symbol of both our sects,” JingYi explains. “Do you see anything else with gold and white?”

SiZhui looks around briefly and shakes his head. “No.”

“Plus, he's a young mistress. What’s wrong with him wearing a hairpin?” JingYi says, the tone so nonchalant that it even scares SiZhui.

“What am I going to do with you?” SiZhui presses two fingers to his temple.

“Anyway, the real deal is on you. What kind of maiden captured the heart of my great best friend, huh?” JingYi grins.

“He doesn’t know, does he?” a voice says, which was far away for SiZhui and JingYi to hear. Grinning, he steps out from a stall, watching the kids walk ahead.

“What does he not know?” another voice, deep and calm responds.

“He doesn’t know he likes Jin Ling!” Wei WuXian happily takes cover in another stall, Lan WangJi's wrist in tow as he follows the two.

“Do we need to hide?” Lan WangJi asks, even as he places himself at the space hidden from sight.

“Of course, we do!” Wei WuXian says, eyes trained on the two. “Ah, youth. But he doesn’t know yet.”

“How do you know he feels that way?” Lan WangJi asks, curiously.

“Let me tell you a thing or two. The fact that the first person he thought of was Jin Ling when he saw that hairpin is already evidence! To go out of his way to buy it for him is even more a big deal when he could’ve just looked and have a good laugh after imagining him wear it,” Wei WuXian explains. “When you like someone, you either give them something to remember you by or…” he pauses, turning to look at Lan WangJi with a mischievous smile.

Lan WangJi's expression remains the same, “Or?”

“Do you really want me to say it?” Wei WuXian laughs, dangling Lan WangJi's money pouch in front of him, “What’s the opposite of give?”

The last question was already the answer. Lan WangJi's expression slightly shifts, “Stop fooling around.”

Wei WuXian laughs some more before he murmurs, “But I wonder, do you think Jin Ling feels the same?”

Lan WangJi picks him up from where he was crouching, “I do not know.”

Wei WuXian makes a 'pft' sound, realizing who he just asked, “Right. How would you know? We’ll just have to wait and see!”

“Mnn,” Lan WangJi walks ahead, this time, with Wei WuXian in tow.

SiZhui and JingYi were sitting in class, along with Jin Ling and the other disciples of their sect, whether involved in the night-hunt or not.

After finishing their classes, SiZhui invites Jin Ling to join them for lunch. Having no one else to bring along outside, because he had a fight with his uncle, he could only accept. But the entire duration of the meal was a drag. Speech was forbidden when dining, so he had to comply, and the worst part was the meal itself.

When they finished, Jin Ling took a deep breath, finally able to breathe. That wasn’t the end yet. Today, he had to finish his quota with them again.

Just as they make their way to the hall, Lan XiChen approaches, “On your way?” he smiles.

“Yes, Sect Leader Lan,” SiZhui answers respectfully, with the others following his salute.

“I suppose it would not hurt to greet a few visitors. They came all the way here to see you,” he gestures for them to follow him.

When they arrive at the sight, the other disciples that went home after that incident turned around, waving at them.

SiZhui and the others walk a bit faster, obviously happy to see them as well. The two groups merge and flock, greeting each other and asking how they were doing. Except for one. Jin Ling wanted to go but was awkward. He remembered how he violently behaved when he saw his uncle injured, thus, stayed a distance away from them.

“You are not going to join them?” Lan XiChen asks, a smile still on his face.

“There is no need, Sect Leader Lan,” Jin Ling answers politely.

“But you want to, so it would not hurt to do so, yes?” he encourages.

However, Jin Ling stays where he was, lowering his gaze to his feet, when a voice calls him. “What are you doing, still standing there?” the voice was clearly irritated.

Another one joins in, “Young Master Jin!”

When he looks up, SiZhui and JingYi were waving their hands, while the others were following suit, with smiles on their faces. A gentle hand presses onto his back, pushing him forward a bit. Now that Lan XiChen was telling him to go, he awkwardly makes his way to the group while scolding SiZhui in his head, After I told him to stop calling me that…

For the next while, they were able to clear up their misunderstandings when the two disciples that were the cause of their severe punishment took the initiative to talk to Jin Ling. But it wasn’t long when they had to part and SiZhui's group had to proceed with their daily punishment. Wei WuXian took the visiting disciples to the back to entertain them in their absence, having nothing else to do. By the time SiZhui and the others came back, they already left.

“It’s such a shame. They could’ve stayed longer,” somebody sighs.

Lan SiZhui wordlessly goes back to his desk to retrieve the scriptures and blank pages of paper, when he notices something. A book with a cover he had never seen before lay under the other books he keeps.

“Hm?” he pulls it out of the compartment, examining it, Maybe somebody left it here by accident? He flips the first page. Nothing. Then, the last page. Written in a tiny note, were the words 'I heard you like these books' then, his full name under it, aligned to the right.

“What is it?” Lan JingYi peers over his shoulder, clutching one of SiZhui's arms to get a better view. “Oh, what book is it?”

SiZhui's eyes unintentionally land on a specific person. Jin Ling was looking straight at them, when he tears his gaze away, in a manner so fast that anyone would guess he's in a foul mood despite his face oddly lacking disdain, showing some sort of restraint instead. SiZhui looks away as well, his cheeks burning hot.

 _W—What am I thinking?_ He scolds himself before the thought pops in his mind.

“Hey, your face is red,” JingYi pulls away, oblivious of the exchange of misinterpreted messages around him. He plucks the book out of SiZhui's hand. “Ah. You really do like these books, huh.”

Jin Ling picks up his things and proceeds to his punishment. Lan SiZhui attempts to call him but holds back, not knowing what to say himself. _Is he embarrassed?_

“Huh? Why is he mad again?” JingYi mutters. “Such a young mistress.”

As they silently work for the day, Jin Ling lowers his legs. He finished earlier than usual and begins to pack up. Lan JingYi decides to break the silence. “Are you finished?”

“What do you think?” Jin Ling answers flatly. His usual scorn was missing, but his displeasure was still there. Only then did SiZhui was finally able to tell that what he thought wasn’t embarrassment but something else, But what was it?

Just what is wrong with him? Lan JingYi sighs, “Well, if you are done, can you wait for a little longer? SiZhui and I are almost—"

“I have to attend to my uncle,” Jin Ling uses the same tone before storming out.

Lan JingYi forgets why he wanted him to stay, dropping his brush in shock. “Just what is his problem? One minute he was okay and the next...! No wonder he finds it difficult to have friends!”

SiZhui doesn’t answer, turning back to his paper, writing faster than the usual, “We will not know unless we ask him.”

“If you want to ask him, go ask him yourself,” Lan JingYi picks up his brush, clearly telling him he wasn’t going to talk with Jin Ling.

Their remaining days were spent with Jin Ling and Lan JingYi always clashing whenever they met. Lan SiZhui could only stand in between them to calm them down. When he got the chance, he would also take Jin Ling with him and JingYi to wander around town, after finishing some errands.

“By the way, because of your hot-and-cold temper, I forgot I was going to give you something,” JingYi breaches the topic while the three of them were in the middle of chatting.

“If you’re going to give me something, do it without running your stupid mouth,” Jin Ling rolls his eyes, turning his head away, Why is he suddenly giving me something? What is it?

“Do you want it or not?” JingYi raises a brow, arms crossed as they walk.

“Why ask me? You’re the one who’s going to give it,” Jin Ling answers vaguely.

“J—JingYi…” SiZhui nudges him lightly.

“What?” JingYi questions SiZhui, but looks past him when his sight lands elsewhere. “Hey, look! I want to ride that.”

“Tsk,” Jin Ling crosses his arms.

JingYi glares at him, “Nobody is asking you to come along. Go back if you want to. It’s not everyday that SiZhui and I can do these things anyway.”

SiZhui smiles gently, “Young Master Jin—"

“When will you stop calling me that?” Jin Ling makes an exasperated noise, his eyes catching JingYi already making his way to the boats.

“Jin Ling, are you going to come with us? If not, I can take you back—”

“Alright, alright,” Jin Ling says, making his way over to where JingYi was.

JingYi was speaking with the owner of the boats. Jin Ling wordlessly pays a silver coin to one of the workers, getting on one of the narrow boats and not even bothering to get his change. SiZhui follows as well, getting onto the boat with a bag of fish feed.

Seeing that they were already on one of the boats, Lan JingYi thanks the owner and makes his way to them. The boat was rocking gently, parting a few inches from the port. Jin Ling makes a face at the unsettled water, stands and extends a hand to Lan JingYi, causing the latter to stop right in front of him. Lan SiZhui was facing the other side, already watching the fish.

“What are you doing?” Lan JingYi blinks, truly having no idea what the gesture meant.

The hand that was extended was quickly retracted, with an excuse thrown in to replace it, “Where’s my change?” Jin Ling steadies his voice, turning his back to him after realizing what he had done.

Lan JingYi, however, paid no notice to the odd behavior as he bought the excuse, “You did not tell me to get it. SiZhui and I will just pay you after we get back.” He jumps aboard easily.

Jin Ling breathes in deeply, feeling a sense of relief when he sees the both of them busy themselves with the fish.

After feeding the fish for a short while, they make their way back just in time for dinner. One of the disciples included in their night-hunt approaches SiZhui, a few of the boys behind them, giggling.

“SiZhui-xiong,” he produces a small note, handing it to him.

“What is this?” he asks, getting the note. 'May this book make your days brighter.'

“What does it say?” Lan JingYi asks.

“Somebody… has been… Who is this?” he asks the one who gave him the note.

“He told me not to reveal his identity yet because he’s embarrassed,” the boy says. “He will approach you when he’s ready.”

The book was a love story that one would not often encounter in their sect's Library Pavilion. Lan JingYi was attentive. “He?”

Lan SiZhui blushes, unintentionally thinking of a name. The boy's eyes grow wide and that was enough for Lan JingYi to confirm that he slipped a part of the anonymous giver's identity.

“Oh? I am not surprised. Indeed, SiZhui's a good catch. Who would not fall for him?” JingYi puts a hand on his chin, praising SiZhui as if he expected something like this would happen sooner. “But... SiZhui's secret admirer and suitor is a boy?” he turns to the boys, “Hey, you better not make fun of SiZhui! Are we not all friends here? Just who is it?” he approaches the rest and jokes around with them.

Amidst their laughter, SiZhui was in a trance. It was wrong to just conclude but he couldn’t help but hope he was indeed correct. When he places the note between one of his books and searches around, Jin Ling was already gone.

Jin Ling tossed and turned in his bed. His uncle had long returned to Yunmeng after a week of recovering, entrusting Lanling to one of his trusted retainers while he was gone. Not that it would make a difference. Even if he asked, how would Jiang Cheng respond? When all he did these years were take care of him, work day and night to fortify his sect, lock up people and lash at them with his whip when he suspected they were Wei WuXian, and recently, end up injured during their encounter in Guanyin temple as well as this night-hunt? He had never ever heard of Jiang Cheng getting involved in romantic affairs. If he asked, wasn’t it the same as insulting his uncle who was blacklisted in the list of potential husbands for female cultivators? The only definite answer he’d get was a smack to the head or the signature threat to his legs.

Sighing, he speaks in a whisper, “What should I do? I lost.”

There was one other option though and apart from experience, a lot of similarity. He shakes his head. _No way. Just no way. I haven’t told him I was sorry yet._ They did speak about a week ago, concerning Jiang Cheng's injuries, but the subject relating to how he terribly treated him before and even stabbed him was never brought up.

The day of Jin Ling's departure, the boys bid him farewell. Lan JingYi fetched something in his room before handing it to Jin Ling. Seeing the box, his features grew suspicious. “A hairpin.” He says, taking it. Anyone would know at first glance what the box was for.

“Yes,” Lan JingYi nods.

Jin Ling swallows, putting it away with his things. “Thank you,” he says coldly.

“You’re not going to open it?” Lan JingYi eyes him as he puts it inside his qiankun bag.

“Seriously? Right now?” Jin Ling's tone told him he wasn’t going to.

“If you open it when you return to Lanling, I would not be there to answer your questions,” Lan JingYi shrugs.

Jin Ling raises a brow, “And why do I need to ask questions? Does this gift of yours mean anything?” after he spits out the question, his cheeks turn pink, eyes growing wide as if the words did not come out from his own mouth.

“Huh? Not really,” Lan JingYi says indifferently, turns around and walks away, apparently done with his farewell, joining the other boys.

Only SiZhui and Jin Ling were left. Any minute, Jiang Cheng would arrive to fetch him. “Jin Ling,” he says, opening his palm for him to see. “Do not lose it.”

“But this—" Jin Ling hesitates.

SiZhui smiles. “Do not worry. I asked Sect Leader Lan and he personally gave it to me. Now, you can visit the Cloud Recesses whenever you need or want to.”

Jin Ling takes the jade token, thinking, At least this one brought something useful. “Thank you, Lan Yuan.”

Having spoken his name, Lan SiZhui felt an inexplicable excitement, stepping back. He bows, “Until next time,” he says, trying not to make it obvious that he was making haste. A few steps, he stops. He retrieves a box, the same one, from his sleeve. He had to give it now or it would be more difficult later. Moreover, the timing was perfect. Once he returns to Lanling, he’d have some time and space to think about it without the awkwardness of having to run into him. He walks in wide strides, picks up one of Jin Ling's hands and puts the box on it.

“Lan Yuan—” Jin Ling blinks in surprise at the usually calm and collected SiZhui's actions.

SiZhui bows again. “You may put this on your mother's grave.”

His mother mentioned, he was even more shocked, “Why?”

“As my thanks to her for giving birth to you,” as soon as he finishes his sentence, SiZhui quickly leaves, his steps wide strides.

Jin Ling stares at him, when he feels a tap on his shoulder along with a chiding voice, “What are you staring at him for?” Jiang Cheng asks, even though he was staring at the same person.

“He's giving this to my mother,” Jin Ling shows Jiang Cheng the hairpin.

Jiang Cheng takes the box and opens it, “How thoughtful of him.” Even though his words were kind, his tone was slightly indifferent. “It’s pretty. Did you thank him?”

“He left before I could,” Jin Ling says, mulling over at something else, What about the one JingYi gave? Was it for my mother as well?

_But he clearly said it was for me…_

“We’re leaving. Hurry up,” Jiang Cheng carefully places back the lid and gives it back to Jin Ling.

After Lan SiZhui made sure he was out of sight, he sighs and catches his friend compiling a stack of papers, with a brush and ink stone on a desk.

“Are you being punished again?” Lan SiZhui asks, peering at the papers.

“Ah, these? These belong to young mistress. I will put these away and clean these ones for when he returns,” Lan JingYi diligently arranges them according to date.

Lan SiZhui was at a trance, the ominous feeling he felt before making its way to his chest. He makes his way, picking up some of the papers to help him.

“JingYi—" he trails off on his own. Was there something he wasn’t telling him?

“You still haven’t found out who sent you that book and notes?” JingYi asks, not looking up.

“No,” SiZhui says.

“What are you going to do?” JingYi asks, already tying the stack of papers with a string.

“I do not know,” SiZhui looks down.

“Why are you so down? You should be happy someone is out there making an effort for you. Why don’t you give him a try? He seems to be nice,” JingYi nudges him with his elbow.

“I will give him some time first. He is embarrassed, after all,” SiZhui answers.

Jin Ling didn’t even have the spare time to change his clothes when he returned. He rushes to his room, pulls out the rectangular box and opens it, revealing a clear glass hairpin with thin swirling stuff of what looked like white and gold sand.

“So, I do not need to ask questions in the first place,” he says, speaking to the hairpin.

It was a hairpin… of a woman. The one he wore was a gold one that wasn’t anything fancy, just a stick of metal. It was one of those worn by men. But this… it was obvious it was for his mother.

“You should’ve just told me it was for my mother,” he chuckles lightly, feeling strange that he was happy it was for his mother but disappointed that it wasn’t for him.

At dinner, Jin Ling asked his uncle a couple of things about what it meant to be the sect leader. Even if he knew how things work, he was forced into that position on a whim, and so he had to at least gain some points on the details.

Jiang Cheng starts with telling him not to worry about it too much since he will be guiding him until he understands how it works. Then, he starts with some of the basics, asking a few questions to see if Jin Ling was getting the hang of it.

“Alright, that should be enough for today,” Jiang Cheng puts down his utensils.

“Uncle, I want to attend some lectures,” Jin Ling, out-of-the-blue, brings it up.

“Where?” Jiang Cheng asks, his expression slightly surprised.

“The Cloud Recesses,” Jin Ling replies, without hesitation.

“Why there?” Jiang Cheng makes a sour face, remembering the boredom, the terrible medicinal soup, Lan QiRen, and his best friend turned lovers with his enemy.

Jin Ling hesitates, not knowing in particular what the sour face was directed at. Then, he slowly explains, “I thought the GusuLan sect's disciples are… advantageous when it comes to knowledge and cultivation.”

“In what ways?” Jiang Cheng almost overlapped with his words.

“Almost all their disciples have strong arms and back in Yi City, they were better at making inferences,” Jin Ling says.

“Do what you want,” Jiang Cheng strides from the hall, as if he was in a hurry.

Holding back the thanks he wanted to say, he watches Jiang Cheng go, wondering what he could possibly be needing to hurry to at this hour. Jiang Cheng was staying in Lanling for the week for him, He must be tired, going back and forth like that. Knowing he wasn’t going to stop him was enough for Jin Ling to walk back in his room with a sense of relief.

“S—Sect Leader Jiang,” a voice calls out to a searching figure near a tree.

Jiang Cheng whirls around, the person he was seeking called out to him first. “You.”

“I—I came here because you told me to,” Wen Ning says in defense, in case Jiang Cheng forgets what he told him the day he left the Cloud Recesses.

Having made his decision, Jiang Cheng walks to him, making Wen Ning take a step back. When he does, Jiang Cheng stops.

“I know it’s in the past,” he says slowly, “but I want you to tell me everything.”

The week had not passed when Jin Ling impatiently returned to the Cloud Recesses. Lan XiChen briefly greeted him before returning to secluded meditation. Every one of the boys he left were excited to see him again.

“Welcome back!” he hears the voice he had been waiting to hear these past five days. JingYi was beaming at him and in the background, SiZhui carrying two books.

He salutes them formally and the two return the salute. During classes, Jin Ling attentively listens and participates. At mealtimes, he wouldn’t go out, enduring the food served to him.

Whenever JingYi was told to rewrite his scriptures, he’d join him in the hall and do the handstand, supporting his weight on one hand, then the other. Although he still had a lot to practice before he could reach the endurance the GusuLan sect disciples have, the time he could hold himself was good enough for someone who did not belong to the sect.

“I’m surprised with how you improved a lot,” Lan JingYi was always the first to initiate a conversation. “And you’re not even being punished.”

When things were hard, anyone would find it difficult to speak. That time he was being punished, he rarely spoke and had to focus on keeping his balance while writing. Even worse, he was past his usual time limit today. He speaks, through gritted teeth, “Shut up and copy your scriptures.”

“Look at that attitude! Why are you even here if you do not want to speak with me? Do you not know it’s awkward to stay with a person and not even talk to them?” Lan JingYi scolds him.

Jin Ling glares at him, putting down his legs when he couldn’t hold it any longer. “Can’t you shut up and let me concentrate?! You keep blabbering stupid, useless things! I didn’t even reach—"

“Stupid? Useless? You call my praise stupid and useless?! And why are you blaming me for your incompetence? Is it my fault you’re that weak?” Lan JingYi puts down his legs as well.

“I’m not weak!” Jin Ling almost shouts.

Lan JingYi sweeps his eyes around in a panic, “Noise is forbidden in the Cloud Recesses!” he scolds. “If you hate it here with me, go back to your room! You do not even need to come here! This space is only for ones being punished!”

“You’re so damn stupid! Can’t you take a hint?! Why did it have to be you?!” Jin Ling blurts out.

Mistaking this as a challenge instead of what it really was, Lan JingYi fumes, “You’re the stupid one! Who in their right mind would stay in the same space as someone they hate?! And I told you, if you want to be here, break some rules first!”

Jin Ling was about to tell him ‘You’re so dense!' when he catches sight of two familiar figures, one waving at him.

“Jin Ling!” Wei WuXian calls out to him.

Jin Ling and Lan JingYi salute them. Lan WangJi gives them a slight nod. Jin Ling only learned of his courtesy name recently after Guanyin temple, hearing from Jiang Cheng that Wei WuXian was the one who issued it.

“Oh, what did you two do this time?” Wei WuXian asks, finding a set of papers in front of JingYi.

“Senior Wei, my script was improper, so I had to rewrite a few of the scriptures. Young Mis—Master Jin, on the other hand—" JingYi looks over at Jin Ling, with an expression that says whatever his business for being here was, it was not his obligation to explain it further.

“I’m doing handstands,” Jin Ling says, “to improve my cultivation.”

Wei WuXian grins, leaving two confused faces with disdain. “You look like you want to get used to life here in the Cloud Recesses,” he says.

The vagueness of what Wei WuXian said was effective on one but the hidden message it held was as clear as water to the other.

Jin Ling pales. Lan JingYi, on the other hand, takes it as another one of Wei WuXian's teasing fits. “Of course, he does.” Taking note of Lan WangJi's presence, he stops himself from adding 'Who doesn’t want to live in this paradise?' thinking it would look like he's bragging.

Hearing this, Wei WuXian grabs Jin Ling's wrist before he could respond, “You are coming with me,” he emphasizes each word. Lan WangJi pays no mind to them as he takes a look at JingYi's revised scriptures.

Jin Ling thought Wei WuXian knew something. He didn't resist and was dragged away to who-knows-where. Lan WangJi follows them after giving JingYi a quick nod, meaning he did well.

“I’m so tired!” Wei WuXian slumps down on the bed. Looking up at the ceiling, he puts a hand on his forehead. “Lan Zhan, it’s much simpler than I thought.”

Lan WangJi settles on his desk, going through a stack of papers. “What is simpler?”

Wei WuXian ignores his question, “Now this is fun. Why don’t we help them out? I wouldn’t want him to just end up secretly liking someone for 13 years like a certain somebody did.”

The hand that was writing on one of the papers stop. Lan WangJi stares at him with a blank expression, making Wei WuXian sit up. “Hm? Oh, right. My bad. It wasn’t 13 years. You’ve liked me since we were 15 or 16 if I remember correctly.”

“Do not fool around,” Lan WangJi says.

“What? It’s annoying. Maybe you can help? You can punish Jin Ling and lock them up in the same room. Let’s see if nothing happens,” Wei WuXian gives him a knowing grin.

“He is doing well in class and did not break any rules. I cannot punish him.”

“Are you telling me you don’t want to help them? You’re so cruel, Lan Zhan,” Wei WuXian lies down again, “If you won’t do anything, you can just come with me and watch.”

After weeks passed, Jin Ling was really frustrated that his relationship with Lan JingYi had not improved one bit, hot and cold like his temper. They always fought but the next day, Lan JingYi would talk to him like nothing happened. Sometimes it was his fault, sometimes it was the other’s for making some offensive remarks or saying something indifferent.

Wei WuXian knew. It was the first thing he asked when he took him away. _Was it that obvious? How come none of the disciples weren’t saying anything?_

He already put the hairpin Lan SiZhui gave him on his mother’s grave, but he carried with him what Lan JingYi gave.

Under the tree near the cold spring, Jin Ling takes out the box from his qiankun bag, asking himself, Why didn’t I just leave this behind?

Then, he feels a tap on his shoulder. “From Lan JingYi?”

Jin Ling jumps, startled. “Stop sneaking up on people! And how did you know?”

“I saw him buy it,” Wei WuXian says, biting into an apple.

Jin Ling puts it away, “What do you want?”

“Why do you look so pissed?”

Jin Ling glares at him. Wei WuXian raises both hands in submission. “If you don’t have anything better to say, leave me alone.”

“So stingy. Are you impatient?” he grins. When Jin Ling doesn’t answer, he continues, “If you want him to notice, you can do something about it.”

“Like what?” Jin Ling asks, a trace of interest in his tone.

Smiling, Wei WuXian gestures with his chin, “Why don’t you show him how much you appreciate the gift he gave you?”

Jin Ling rolls his eyes in disappointment, “Are you crazy? This is for my mother.”

Wei WuXian adds another bite to the apple, “He said so?”

“What do you think? This is a woman’s hairpin,” Jin Ling snorts.

“Ask him who’s it for. I’m pretty sure I didn’t hear wrong.”

Jin Ling looks at him, studying him carefully. Wei WuXian widens his grin, causing Jin Ling to turn his gaze away.

“What do you mean?” Jin Ling’s tone was detached. But in his mind, he was already in a state of excitement. What did he not hear wrong? But then again, behind Wei WuXian’s confidence, it might just be a front to get him to ask Lan JingYi and get a good laugh after he’d been exposed.

“Try wearing it.”

Jin Ling’s eyes widen, “What if he gets mad?”

Wei WuXian stifles a laughter, “Don’t take this the wrong way but that sounds more like your reaction to every little thing.”

Before he could retort in anger, Lan WangJi shows up. “HanGuang-Jun,” he bows.

“Lan Zhan!” Wei WuXian clings to an arm, “Bye now.”

Jin Ling was left behind, pondering over it. What Wei WuXian suggested made a lot of sense. He heard it himself. It was for him, but why a woman’s hairpin?

Lan JingYi was in the middle of replacing Jin Ling’s ink stone. After that, he goes straight to Jin Ling’s room, cleaning up the floor and gathering all of the books in a neat stack.

“Well done, young mistress. You’re studying well,” he says. “When is he coming back?” he looks around. “Where is he?”

Checking the books Jin Ling was reading, he takes one and stands, “I’m pretty sure Sir told us to read the old version. Why is he reading this?”

Wei WuXian was passing by when he steps out of the room, holding the book he took. “Senior Wei,” he bows after making sure Lan QiRen wasn’t around.

“This is Jin Ling’s room,” Wei WuXian raises an eyebrow.

“I often go to clean it up when he is not here,” Lan JingYi answers politely.

“SiZhui?”

“He is out with the juniors.”

Wei WuXian nods, then notices the book in Lan JingYi’s hands. “What’s that?”

Lan JingYi looks to here he was pointing, “He took the wrong version.”

A grin forms on Wei WuXian’s lips, “Hmm. I better get going. If you’re looking for him, he’s under the tree near the cold spring.”

“Thank you, Senior Wei,” Lan JingYi bows.

After replacing the book and putting it back in Jin Ling’s room, JingYi prepares to leave when Jin Ling enters.

“What are you doing here?” Jin Ling’s brows knit in displeasure.

“Your room is a mess,” Lan JingYi answers nonchalantly, unaware of Jin Ling’s heartbeat in a frenzy.

_Why is he here? Did I leave some dirty clothes on the floor? Did I scatter the books I was reading last night?_

Jin Ling couldn’t speak, his mind a jumble. Lan JingYi speaks, “Do not be so angry. I was just cleaning your room for you.”

“Y—You were the one behind it all this time?”

“Yes. So you better clean up from time to time,” JingYi says. “And pay attention to class. Your mind’s in the clouds these days. What happened to you?”

He couldn’t possibly tell him it was all his fault, “Why didn’t you tell me you were the one cleaning all this time?”

Lan JingYi walks past him to the door as he says, “For what? Anyway, you can study now. I have something to do.”

“Lan JingYi,” Jin Ling calls him in a slightly trembling voice. “Where are you going?”

JingYi turns around, “... Wait here.”

Jin Ling attempts to follow him when Lan JingYi strides to him pushes him back and weighs him down onto the floor at his desk, hands on his shoulders.

“I told you to wait,” Lan JingYi chides him.

He steps out for a time, only to return with a basin of cold water and a towel over his shoulder, putting it on the floor beside the bed. As this puzzled Jin Ling for a second, it gave Lan JingYi the opportunity to pull him up and force him on the bed.

Jin Ling's face grew redder, his heart thumping with anticipation, “What the hell are you doing?!” he yells at him.

JingYi sits on the side, holding him down with a hand on his chest, too strong for Jin Ling to move. He dips the towel in the basin and wrings it out with both hands. With the weight removed on him, Jin Ling was able to sit up when the towel was slapped onto his forehead.

“If you are sick, you could’ve just told someone. You did not have to go to class in such a state,” Lan JingYi says in his usual tone, holding the towel and pressing it to Jin Ling's left cheek.

“Sick?” Jin Ling's brows knit. Then, it dawns on him that Lan JingYi is even more stupid than he thought. “I. Am. Not. Sick,” he grits out every word in anger.

“That is exactly what’s wrong with you! You are so afraid of admitting defeats that you can’t even ask for help when you need it!” Lan JingYi snaps at him, but was gentle as he runs the cold towel along Jin Ling's face. “Your face is all red. How could you endure this all by yourself?”

The redness of his face was nothing more than the effect of his panic of what Lan JingYi might’ve seen in his room and the fact that they were the only ones present. It wasn’t because he was sick. Even so, Jin Ling obediently lets him do whatever he wants. It's not like he didn’t want JingYi touching him. And this wasn’t a chance he usually gets everyday.

“I can do it myself,” he says coldly.

“You let me this far and now you’re saying that,” Lan JingYi says, focusing on wiping Jin Ling's face and neck.

But to Jin Ling's remark, Lan JingYi gives him the towel. Jin Ling was forced to take it as he watches Lan JingYi stand. “You…” he hisses in disappointment.

“I will come back to change the water. For now, I have to feed HanGuang-Jun's rabbits,” Lan JingYi grins, waving at him before going.

“You better come back,” Jin Ling mutters after he was long gone.

“It was all a misunderstanding, huh?” Jiang Cheng mutters to himself after letting Wen Ning finish the part about Qiongqi path.

Wen Ning wanted no more than to just run far away from Jiang Cheng but he also considered what the latter said. They were going to see each other again no matter what.

“It was all that Su She's fault and Jin ZiXun,” Jiang Cheng spits. One sign of the improvement of their relationship was that Zidian was in its ring form these past few days.

Wen Ning was sitting quietly on the same sofa, his gaze lowered. Jiang Cheng's eyes all the while were trained on him. He continues, “You look like you don’t really want to talk to me.”

“I—It's not what you think, Sect Leader Jiang,” Wen Ning quickly looks up, seeing Jiang Cheng's handsome face with a cold expression.

“Then, why can’t you look at me?” Jiang Cheng puts his chin on his palm that was supported by his elbow resting on his thigh. “I’m not even using Zidian.”

Because it would be disrespectful to look at him? That every time he does, Jiang Cheng had to look at him with disgust and contempt? He’d been whipped and thrown across the room on a whim and he’s asking why he didn’t want to talk to him? What does he even want from him?

Jiang Cheng sighs, “Tell me what happened to you.”

“W—What?” Wen Ning couldn’t help but exclaim. He had never told anything that didn’t involve Wei WuXian to him, leaving that part.

“How did you die?” Jiang Cheng repeats, his words more direct.

Wen Ning was counting the time. The time Jiang Cheng had been spending with him these days grew shorter and shorter every time they met, either at Lanling or Yunmeng. Right now, he should’ve been sleeping an hour ago.

His death wasn’t something he wanted to remember. But Jiang Cheng wouldn’t care about his 'feelings' if he had any. Slowly, he says, “Sect Leader Jiang—"

“If you don’t want to talk about it, you can just say so,” Jiang Cheng says.

Wen Ning couldn’t believe his ears. So he gave him a choice? “I’m sorry,” he mumbles.

Jiang Cheng suddenly stands and walks over to the sofa he was sitting on. Out of impulse, Wen Ning moves over, thinking Jiang Cheng might want to sit. But the latter makes a face and with a flick of his hand, a purple lighting flashes in front of Wen Ning. He wasn’t thrown across the room, but rather, he finds himself unable to move.

“If you run, I’ll lock you up,” Jiang Cheng threatens.

Wen Ning looks down, finding Zidian wrapped around him tightly, “I wasn’t running!” he protests.

“You were about to,” Jiang Cheng sits down, a feet of space separating them.

“I just moved over!”

“Fine, but you’re not getting away from me if you ever think about it,” Jiang Cheng scoots over.

“It's past 11 PM,” Wen Ning says in a panic, not even knowing why he was 'feeling' nervous.

“You think I don’t know that?”

“Did I… Did I do something wrong?” Wen Ning's tone was desperate, “If not, please let me go.”

“No,” Jiang Cheng reaches out when he fully cornered Wen Ning at the boundary of the sofa. “You will run as soon as I do.”

“I won’t, please! Sect Leader Jiang—" he stops abruptly when Jiang Cheng's fingers settle on his hair, gently working out a few tangles. “Huh?”

“If it weren’t for you… I’ll die without even knowing anything…” Jiang Cheng mumbles, as if he was under some sort of spell and was talking to himself. “If it weren’t for you, I would’ve hated and pursued him all my life…”

“If you regret it, you should go see him,” Wen Ning says.

Jiang Cheng wordlessly runs his fingers through Wen Ning's hair for a while before he says in a low voice, “It’s been… bothering me lately…”

“HanGuang-Jun won’t stop you if you just say you want to talk,” Wen Ning says.

“Not them,” Jiang Cheng quickly corrects him.

“Then, what is bothering you?” Wen Ning then, moves his head away an inch from Jiang Cheng's hand.

“You don’t like it?” Jiang Cheng's expression was hideous, his hand strongly gripping Wen Ning's arm.

“No, I like it! I like it!” Wen Ning exclaims, without knowing what he was referring to. All he wanted to do was make sure Jiang Cheng wouldn’t lash out.

Hearing this, Jiang Cheng's grip relaxes, his expression quite pleased. “If you like it so much, don’t move away.”

Wen Ning freezes. He didn’t want to assume, but no matter how he looked at it, the impossible was happening right in front of him. He doesn’t move, his gaze trained on the person before him. _He seems so happy…_ as he thought, the tension leaves his body. If this could make Jiang Cheng feel a bit positive, then he doesn’t mind.

“I will see you tomorrow, Sect Leader Jiang,” Wen Ning says, after a while of silence.

Jiang Cheng flinches, then retracts his hand. “Come after dinner.”

“That’s too early. Do you need anything else?” Wen Ning says.

“Do you have a problem with the time?” Jiang Cheng glares at him.

“No, no! But somebody might see me if…”

“Alright. Come at the usual time,” Jiang Cheng stands, retrieving Zidian. He walks to the door, with his back to Wen Ning. “Good night.”

“G—Good night!” Wen Ning says in a panic just as the door closed. _He heard it, right?_

Jin Ling was in the Cloud Recesses, so he didn’t get the chance to hear about his father. Wen Ning was aware that he’d been listening to their conversation since the first night, but didn’t show signs of aggression. A sense of relief washes over him. If Young Master Jin heard us just now, what would he think?

Meanwhile, as Jiang Cheng walked in the hallway, he was tensed. But he could only hold on to what Wen Ning said of his own accord. That he’d see him tomorrow. He leans on the wall, “Just now… what was that?” he murmurs, clutching his chest.

“I don’t believe it! Impossible!” Lan JingYi's angry voice fills the air.

“Calm down,” SiZhui chides him.

“You can ask him if you want,” Wei WuXian was in the middle of telling them what Lan WangJi was like when he was drunk, how he even stole a pair of chickens and jujubes, and wrote and drew graffiti on a wall.

“Why are you even telling us all this? Are you that bored?” Jin Ling throws a carrot at Wei WuXian, seeing through his motive.

After their banter with Wei WuXian, who managed to get them to listen to him every time they feed rabbits, they make it in time for afternoon classes. JingYi showed quite the interest but always ended up getting mad when the next words did not favour Lan WangJi's reputation. SiZhui was calm, but was always asking twice, showing him that he didn’t completely trust Wei WuXian. Jin Ling on the other hand, could only throw mean remarks at him.

“What?” Jin Ling was about to leave when Wei WuXian caught his sleeve.

“He really doesn’t know,” Wei WuXian says. “So, go do something.”

After a few moments, “I know.”

SiZhui was already in the middle of the book recently sent to him. He wanted to catch who the sender was, but the other disciples weren’t on his side. After a few bribes here and there, to his disappointment, he was able to find out that the sender didn’t reside in the Cloud Recesses with them, meaning his guess all along wasn’t the sender.

“If he got the other disciples to turn on you, that only means he is serious about you and has good intentions,” Lan JingYi says.

“But he didn’t even say what his intention was,” Lan SiZhui says, his spirits low.

Lan JingYi's head whirls to his direction, “Seriously, SiZhui? Is there even a need to say it? Of course, he likes you! You really don’t know anything when it comes to these things, huh?”

At the opposite side of Lan SiZhui, Jin Ling snorts at his last sentence, as though he was saying that Lan JingYi had no right to say it. It was a good thing JingYi didn’t notice.

The next day, Lan JingYi decided to make his way to Jin Ling's room to check the state of it. “Young mistress Jin?” he knocks.

Jin Ling slams the door open, “Watch what you say! Who are you calling young mistress?”

Lan JingYi peers inside, “Let me check your room?”

“Why do you need to check it? You won’t find anything,” Jin Ling steps aside.

Lan JingYi looks around. Everything was in order. “Then, I will be on my way.”

Jin Ling, “Wait.”

“What?” JingYi turns around.

Jin Ling gulps. Then, he stares at JingYi's eyes, “Look at me.”

“Why would I look at you?” JingYi asks in disbelief. His tone was still carefree as always.

“Damn it! Just do it!”

Lan JingYi does as he says. After he looked carefully did he notice what Jin Ling was making him see. Then, he hears his own heartbeat run wildly. “Y—You’re wearing it?”

“Took you that long to notice?” Jin Ling crosses his arms.

He was beautiful, indeed. And now that he was wearing the hairpin, his features took a turn to the more feminine side. With his chest throbbing from the pain of his heart racing so much, Lan JingYi suddenly became conscious that they were alone in his room.

“B—But why are you…. Why are you wearing it?” Lan JingYi finds it difficult to speak as he points at Jin Ling.

“So, it wasn’t for me?”

“It is for you! But I was not expecting you to wear it! It was more like I just wanted you to keep it,” Lan JingYi's mind was in rumbles. After all, no one would mistake that hairpin for a man's yet here it was, stuck in Jin Ling's hair.

“You gave it to me. I couldn’t possibly not wear it,” Jin Ling emphasizes the word 'not'.

Lan JingYi was speechless. He was so focused on figuring out his own feelings that he failed to see that Jin Ling, at that moment, was confessing to him. Wanting to buy himself some time, he speaks, “T—Take it off… someone might see.”

It was Jin Ling's turn to enter a state of shock. His voice cracked, “You gave it to me, then you’re telling me to take it off? Now that it has come to this?”

Lan JingYi looks everywhere, not hearing the last question. He didn’t know what he was feeling. And he didn’t want Jin Ling to find out without confirming it himself first. Regaining his composure, “That is a woman's hairpin. Are you going to walk around the Cloud Recesses with that in your hair? Obviously not.”

“And what are you going to do if I did?”

“Of course, I would laugh at you,” Lan JingYi swallows back a gasp. His tone was the usual JingYi, the one he uses when he was stating the obvious, but beneath it, he wanted to anger Jin Ling so he could get away and let him think. _Is his pride too huge for him to be embarrassed to take it off? But he can’t just let anyone see him like that!_

As predicted, Jin Ling was angered by his nonchalance to the point that he puts his hand on the hilt of his sword, “Then, laugh! What are you waiting for?!”

“That is why I am telling you to take it off!” Lan JingYi steps back, prepared to break into a run.

“For someone who made that script, you’re so damn stupid! You’re so disgusting I can’t even look at you!” Jin Ling sprints out of the room.

“What script?!” Lan JingYi shouts, running after him but stopping at the open door.

On his way, Wei WuXian catches sight of Jin Ling running to his direction. “Running is forbidden—"

“You said it would work! I’m leaving!” Jin Ling yells at him, running past him. Wei WuXian turns around when he does, particularly looking at his head. The hairpin was there.

“Was he rejected? That’s impossible. Lan JingYi definitely likes him,” We WuXian says to himself. “Could it be…” before he finishes his sentence, he runs in the direction of Jin Ling's room where he caught JingYi once.

His hunch being right, Lan JingYi was frozen at the door, his eyes blank like he was thinking of something.

“JingYi!” he calls out to him.

Lan JingYi finally returned, bowing to him, “Senior Wei.”

“What happened?” he gets straight to the point.

“What 'what happened’?” JingYi asks.

“Just now, I saw Jin Ling running away. Did you two fight?” he asks.

Lan JingYi ponders for a few moments before, “Senior Wei, he, um…”

“He what?”

“I do not understand… why he would be so angry over such a thing.”

“Lan JingYi, oh, Lan JingYi,” Wei WuXian sighs, “Why don’t you let me borrow you for a bit and see if I can help you figure out some things?”

“What things?” Lan JingYi frowns at him, glancing at Jin Ling's room.

Wei WuXian smirks, catching this, “I won’t tell you if you don’t come with me.”

Reluctantly, Lan JingYi walks to him and Wei WuXian leads him to the back mountains to feed the rabbits.

“Here,” Jiang Cheng opens the door. It was his own room, with his office.

Wen Ning was even more uncomfortable, being clueless as to why Jiang Cheng was behaving this way. Jiang Cheng gestures for him to sit down on a sofa and he does. “Thank you.”

Jiang Cheng sits down next to him. “What’s next?”

“Sect Leader Jiang… what I told you yesterday was the end,” Wen Ning says. It was true. He finished telling the remaining parts up to the present.

“I wasn’t talking about that. Tell me a story,” Jiang Cheng says, facing forward with his arm on the backrest.

“I am not good at telling stories. I do not know… any stories,” Wen Ning answers, getting that 'nervous' feeling again.

Jiang Cheng turns his head sideways, looking at him, “Then, make something up.”

“But… but I can’t just…” Wen Ning was at a loss. What does he intend to do?

But at the very least, Jiang Cheng's expression did not change in the slightest. He only leans to him, grasping Wen Ning's hand. He puts it on his chest, his eyes never looking away. “Do you feel it?”

“Feel what?” Wen Ning asks. If he wasn’t dead, he would’ve been blinking in surprise and confusion.

Right then, Jiang Cheng was obviously angered, “You don’t feel it?”

“I am a corpse,” Wen Ning says, a little too strongly because Jiang Cheng was being unreasonable.

“So what? You should know what you’re supposed to feel,” Jiang Cheng presses.

“How can I if I don’t feel anything?” Wen Ning says. But contrary to his expectations, he could somewhat… feel in a different way. _But how could I? When I wasn’t supposed to?_

“Then, imagine it!” Jiang Cheng's grip was forceful. “You felt sorry for Wei WuXian even though you were dead, so why can’t you feel anything towards me?”

“That was—"

“Enough!” Jiang Cheng drops his hand. He pushes him down. “Now, look at me.”

Wen Ning does as he was told, if it meant getting out of this awkward position. When he doesn’t speak, Jiang Cheng breathes sharply. “Do I look good?” he asks.

After a few moments, “Ah, yes! You are very handsome, Sect Leader Jiang,” Wen Ning nods frantically, after he learned what Jiang Cheng was trying to make him say.

A very pleased smile forms on Jiang Cheng's face, making Wen Ning's statement true to itself. It was then that Wen Ning 'felt' another kind of nervousness. He didn’t want to look away from Jiang Cheng's face and he didn’t want to leave. It was the first time since he saw Jiang Cheng cry that he did not want time to go faster.

“Say my name,” Jiang Cheng says, running his fingers through his hair.

“J—Jiang… Cheng…” Wen Ning forces his courtesy name out, thinking it would be rude if he actually called him by his birth name.

A flame seemed to be ignited in Jiang Cheng's eyes. Wen Ning closes his eyes in 'fear', thinking he’d done something wrong again. When he doesn’t hear any of Jiang Cheng's nasty demands, he opens his eyes, only to find somebody's lashes magnified so much that he could see them individually.

“Sect Leader Jiang?!” Wen Ning turns his head away, surprised.

But Jiang Cheng turns his face back, “Shut up,” he says against Wen Ning's lips, kissing him again.

He couldn’t understand what was going on. Controlling his force, he pushes Jiang Cheng's chest away. “I am a corpse!” he repeats. “Are you out of your mind?”

Jiang Cheng was pushed back but remained sitting on his lap. He didn’t look angry and wordlessly took off his top. Wen Ning was in a state of panic, wanting to throw Jiang Cheng off him but was afraid he’d hurt him.

His momentary distraction lets Jiang Cheng kiss him again, hands gripping both his wrists. Wen Ning didn’t exactly dislike it, but he couldn’t possibly let Jiang Cheng do these kind of things to a corpse like him. He was afraid of the consequences it would bring upon Jiang Cheng.

“No…” he says hoarsely, against the lips that were attacking his.

“I know… you like me, too,” Jiang Cheng pulls away, his breathing disordered. “You said so yourself.”

Wen Ning could almost imagine his eyes growing wide if they could. “W—When… I did not say anything like that!”

“You said you liked it when I touch you. You said you were going to see me the day after. And now, you let me straddle you and even told me I’m handsome. I’m absolutely sure it all points to the same thing,” Jiang Cheng says quickly.

But that was because he was in a pinch! Because he had no choice!

Wen Ning, “Do you not understand? I am a corpse with no feelings.”

“You expect me to believe you?! When you said you’d look after the kids, does that not count? When you told me the truth about Wei WuXian, wasn’t it because you were sorry? And have you forgotten? You stayed when I cried! Because you FELT like you had to!” Jiang Cheng pants, his eyes full of sorrow.

They were both silent. Wen Ning says quietly, “We… can’t…”

Jiang Cheng calmly looks at him, before he gets off. Wen Ning sits up, about to feel relieved when he finds Zidian coiled tightly around him. Before he could speak, Jiang Cheng does, “If you can’t feel anything, I suppose I need to help you be able to,” he says, tugging at Zidian.

Wen Ning was pulled forward on his knees to the floor. Jiang Cheng pulls forcefully again, propping him to his feet and walks in the direction of the bed.

“You can’t do this!” Wen Ning protests.

“If you don’t want to, you can just kill me. But if you do that, it would be your fault that not only Jin Ling is parentless right now, but that he won’t have anyone by his side,” Jiang Cheng continues to tug at him.

“Is that a threat? Why are you doing this?! Let’s talk, please!” Wen Ning begs, knowing he could never leave a single scratch on Jiang Cheng because of guilt.

“The only way to get out of this is to kill me,” Jiang Cheng says in a chilly tone, “Save us both the trouble and stop resisting. We both like each other, so what’s wrong with this?”

“What’s wrong? I’m a corpse! If Young Master Jin found out, what would he think?!” Wen Ning was already by the bed.

“That brat doesn’t know anything. He shouldn’t meddle in adults' business,” Jiang Cheng gives Wen Ning's sash belt a few, firm tugs.

Wen Ning could still use his hands, so he holds his sash belt tight so Jiang Cheng could not untie it. “No. I don’t want to.”

“Yes, you want to,” Jiang Cheng changed his statement, as if he wasn't listening anymore.

“Why are you being like this, Sect Leader Jiang?” Wen Ning's hands transfer to Jiang Cheng's. Holding them gently, as if trying to make a stubborn child understand, he carefully says, “Do you understand what position this would put you and Young Master Jin in? I beg you, Sect Leader Jiang…”

“Careful. You broke my arm once,” Jiang Cheng says calmly, dodging the question.

Wen Ning immediately drops his hands in surprise. “I—I didn’t mean—wait. Are you listening to me?”

Jiang Cheng continues what he was doing, retracting Zidian. He pulls Wen Ning's sash belt in one swift tug, and it falls to the floor. Then, he immediately pulls down Wen Ning's robe exposing his shoulders.

“Sect Leader—" Wen Ning turns around and prepares to leap away but Jiang Cheng embraces him from behind, immobilizing him. Not that he couldn’t escape, but his priority makes him unable to do so, being 'never leave a scratch on Jiang Cheng'. If he leapt to get to the window, he would not only leave a large crater on the floor, but that he would be unable to fulfill his promise.

“Why?!” he yells at Wen Ning. “Why the hell are you trying so hard to get away from me?!”

If Wen Ning could cry, he'd long had wet the floor with his overflowing tears. “If I… put another one of you in danger…” he forces the words out, not able to continue.

But those simple words were enough for Jiang Cheng to see through him: he was the one who killed Jin ZiXuan. And never will he be able to forgive himself if he or Jin Ling would end up the same fate, either in his hands or the people awaiting the two's downfall.

Still, Jiang Cheng does not let go, turning Wen Ning to face him. Then, he looks into his eyes, “Then, tell me in words. Do you like me or not?”

Expecting some other questions about his escape or some more unreasonable remarks like he didn’t have the right to choose, Wen Ning was unprepared for what was thrown at him. If he said he didn’t like Jiang Cheng, he’d be lying. But if he said he did, who knows what the other would do?

Just as he quickly made a decision, choosing the first option, his slight delay puts a smile on Jiang Cheng's face, as though he already took that delay as a confirmation. The next thing he went for was Wen Ning's trousers.

“No, no, no! I don’t like you!” Wen Ning grasps his shoulders, as gently as he could, as if his last-minute answer could still save them from the mistake they were about to do.

“Liar,” Jiang Cheng hisses, brushing off his hands. “You dare lie to me, and I won’t be gentle no matter how much you beg.”

“You don’t understand!” Wen Ning reasons out. “You’re also forcing me to do things! You’re not giving me—"

“It is not me who does not understand!” Jiang Cheng shouts. “You’re the one… who doesn’t understand…”

The words that were about to come out of Wen Ning's were halted by the sight before him. Jiang Cheng does not look away, even as his sight was already so blurry. His hands were trembling as they squeeze the other's shoulders.

“You don’t understand…” he says, his voice so soft one had to listen carefully. “I already messed up once… I’m not about to do it again…” he collapses on his knees, his tears dotting the ground. His voice hoarse, he repeats, “I will not do it again.”

Wen Ning pulls him up, making him sit on the bed. After he does, he fixes his robe, pulling it over his shoulders again. Although Jiang Cheng's words leave him questions, he knew he wasn’t in the position to satisfy his curiosity. He wordlessly dabs his sleeve onto Jiang Cheng's face, while the latter sniffles quietly, his eyes to his side, refusing to look at him.

As he looked at Jiang Cheng's face tilted slightly to the side, filled with sorrow and what could be described as 'sulking', he burns the image in his memory, before standing and turning around once more. As he thought about it, he indeed wonder why this was so hard… even though he was a corpse. But that was exactly what made it so… because he was a corpse that he can’t let Jiang Cheng love him.

“One more step and you’ll end up in the dungeon,” Jiang Cheng says, his voice trembling.

Wen Ning fights the urge to stop. But he does, looking over his shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry! All you have to do is stay with me!” Jiang Cheng was being forceful again.

He snatches Wen Ning's hand and pulls it with force that Wen Ning was forced backwards. He catches the falling body, supporting it so they both do not collapse on the bed. Wen Ning was 'shocked', finding himself sitting on Jiang Cheng's lap. When he tries to get up, Jiang Cheng locks an arm around his waist, his other across his chest. “Just… I promise we won’t run into each other again!” Wen Ning puts his hands on Jiang Cheng's arms, trying to peel them open.

“That’s exactly what I don’t want to happen!” Jiang Cheng puts all his strength into keeping him in place.

“You’re being unreasonable, Sect Leader Jiang!”

“Say whatever you want. I told you the only way out is to kill me!” Jiang Cheng pulls him down on the bed. Then, he rolls over so he was on top. “I let you tell me stories every night. It’s your turn to listen to mine.”

“I do not want to hear it.” Wen Ning controls his force, trying to push off Jiang Cheng who puts his weight completely on him.

Jiang Cheng starts quickly, “There was once a boy who became a sect leader at such a young age after suffering through so much with the lost of his parents and annihilation of his sect. Just as he thought everything was fine, his best friend had to defect from his sect after he just rebuilt it, to protect the remnants of the sect that brought upon its destruction. He knew they were innocent, but what can he do? Defy the will of countless sects that prey upon the mistake of others? The lives of the people in the sect he rebuilt, as well as his sister's rest upon his shoulders, his decision. He had to choose—"

Wen Ning writhes under him, sensing that the next words he might hear will stop him from leaving. He had to get away.

Jiang Cheng slams both his wrists against the mattress, screaming, “Listen to me!”

“No…” Wen Ning shrinks back, seemingly terrified at how Jiang Cheng's face turned ugly out of rage.

“He knew what he had to do. He told his best friend that he wouldn’t be in the right even if he was. In the name of his sect and his sister, in order to protect them, he turned his back on his best friend. And when his sister died, he had to hate him, blaming him for choosing the ghostly path when he could’ve just returned to the right path, not knowing that he couldn’t!”

Still struggling, Wen Ning turns his head away, as if doing so would let him hear less. Jiang Cheng snorts at his poor attempt. He continues, “He thought everything he did was right. Not until somebody had to let him know about the things he never knew even when 13 years had passed since his best friend’s death. He would’ve never known in two lifetimes if nobody told him.”

Drops of tears fall again on Wen Ning's exposed right cheek. Wen Ning slowly looks to him again, seeing the pain Jiang Cheng had been enduring all this time. He stops momentarily, overcome by the need to let him finish, now that he listened this far.

“I kept saying he left me for the Wens… when I could’ve also stayed with him… when I should’ve convinced the others that those Wens were innocent. In the end, all I did was nothing. If I did, maybe he wouldn’t have been cornered like this.”

“That was… none of your fault,” Wen Ning says slowly, hoping his words would cease the other's belief that he had anything to do with the massacre of his family.

“I refused to listen to you… but I really know why you don’t want to be with me,” Jiang Cheng sniffles.

“Wh—What are you saying?” Wen Ning was perplexed, as to how this matter just came out of nowhere.

“I refused to help those who saved my life once. If I just… if I spoke up for all of you, maybe your family didn’t have to die. If I sought after you before you fell in somebody else's hands… if only I found you before they did… you might still be alive right now…” Jiang Cheng forces the last phrase out.

Wen Ning feels some sort of emotion explode inside him, despite the hole in his chest. The next thing he does changes the expression on the other's face. “What happened to us was nobody's fault, Sect Leader Jiang.”

Jiang Cheng's eyes grow wide, not because of what he was seeing as his sight was too blurry with tears, but because of the cold hand on his left cheek. “You?!”

“It is not because I do not want to be with you. I never thought of getting away from you because I want to—"

He doesn’t finish when Jiang Cheng sweeps off his tears once and lowers his face to him, nose touching nose. Wen Ning purses his lips tightly, unsure of what to do. It wasn’t long before the silence was broken again, “I knew you like me,” Jiang Cheng says, brushing his lips lightly on Wen Ning's.

He couldn’t deny it any longer, “Y—Yes, Sect Leader Jiang. I do,” he answers hesitantly.

The gloomy atmosphere was replaced by joy. Jiang Cheng grins, “I said I’ll help you be able to feel again, did I not?”

“You did,” Wen Ning replies, his voice very soft.

Jiang Cheng could almost imagine him blush. He rakes his fingers through Wen Ning's hair. Not having the patience to say anything more, he looks once into the other's eyes, before pressing his lips onto Wen Ning's.

They kiss for some time, when Jiang Cheng pushes Wen Ning's robe off his shoulders again. Wen Ning puts his hands on Jiang Cheng's trousers, tugging at it to come off. When he was too slow, Jiang Cheng gets off him to do it himself, then went for Wen Ning's, pulling it off him while he was lying on the bed.

Completely naked, Jiang Cheng fixes their position, hovering above the him. Then, he lowers his face, kissing him once again.

Jiang Cheng eases himself off Wen Ning, panting and slightly trembling. He collapses beside him, then pulls Wen Ning to his chest, hugging him tightly.

“Sect Leader…” Wen Ning says, his voice shy and timid.

“This time, you will not tell me you didn’t feel anything,” Jiang Cheng says, his tone commanding. “Whether you like it or not, you will stay with me until I die.”

“But… Young Master Jin might not take this too well,” Wen Ning says, quietly.

“Why are you still worried about that brat?” Jiang Cheng's tone was enough for Wen Ning to imagine what kind of expression he was making, given how his sight was temporarily impaired due to his head being pressed to the other's chest.

“I… don’t want him… to hate me,” Wen Ning says slowly.

Jiang Cheng's embrace loosens slightly. It was true that he could stop Jin Ling from attacking Wen Ning if the situation presents itself. But what Wen Ning wanted wasn’t something he could just force onto Jin Ling. He can’t force someone's feelings.

“I will tell him after I let him settle things,” Jiang Cheng says, his tone cold in contrast to his kind intentions.

“Settle things?” Wen Ning looks up.

Seeing Wen Ning's face, Jiang Cheng's heart thumps, his cheeks growing hotter. Clearing his throat, he says, “He’d been acting strange. He was suddenly nice… only to ask me to study in the Cloud Recesses.”

“I am aware of that. Does that not mean he made friends with the disciples there?” Wen Ning asks, “Maybe Young Master Lan SiZhui and Young Master Lan JingYi in particular?”

Jiang Cheng ponders for a few moments. The two looked similar but if he saw them in person again, he would be able to tell which one was the funny one. But what bothers him about Jin Ling was something that he couldn’t explain. Due to his priorities and how this matter seemed harmless, he disregards it, wanting to focus more on Wen Ning. “Fine. I understand he needs friends.”

“Right,” Wen Ning nods, as if he was talking to himself.

Jiang Cheng searches for Wen Ning's hand with his, grasping it tightly. Then, he pulls Wen Ning's head tighter to his chest, using the hand that was hooked underneath him. “Hmm…” he sighs in satisfaction.

“Um… Sect Leader Jiang?” Wen Ning says in a panic. “I… I should go. It is already late.”

Jiang Cheng holds him tighter, “You are not going anywhere.”

“But—"

“If I can’t defend someone important to me, where does that put me? I will protect you and Jin Ling no matter what.”

“I’m not ready to be seen yet,” Wen Ning insists, trying to prolong the safe stage.

Jiang Cheng looks down at him. “Alright.”

“Thank you, Sect—"

“In case you don’t know, my birth name is Jiang WanYin.”

“I do know that…” Wen Ning mumbles.

Jiang Cheng's brows scrunch, “Then, why the hell are you still calling me that?”

“Y—You didn’t give me permission…”

“Between lovers, permission is not needed for such things.”

Sighing, he takes off the hairpin that Lan JingYi gave him, put it inside the box and put the box inside the drawer by his bed.

“Wei Ying… you liar,” he says.

“Where is he?!” Lan JingYi was almost running around, ignoring the other disciples reminding him of the rule.

“JingYi, calm down. He must’ve gone somewhere,” Lan SiZhui says, holding back from panicking as well. He was just as worried as he was.

“What if something happens to him?! He’s such a brat! Running off like that just because I told him to take it off!”

“Shh! Noise is—"

“Talking behind others' backs—"

“Walking too fast is—"

“Oh, shut up! Now is not the time!” Lan JingYi's words stop them halfway from saying a few of the sect rules JingYi just broke.

“Take what off?” one asks.

“The hairpin I gave him,” Lan JingYi says. “For all I know, he was just embarrassed that he did not realize those are for women so in order to save some face, he did not want to take it off!”

At the same time, Wei WuXian was strolling towards them, with a rolled up paper in hand. “Did I miss anything?”

Lan JingYi did not have the spare time to pay attention to him. Earlier, they fed rabbits. Wei WuXian made him tell him everything that happened, asked a few very vague questions, and left. He did not tell him anything.

After bowing to Wei WuXian, SiZhui repeats, “He… wore that?” the rest of the disciples mirror his shocked expression, immediately learning Jin Ling's intention.

“Yes! And he even told me 'for someone who made that script, you’re so damn stupid'! What script?! Just what is he saying?!” Lan JingYi was a mess, striding quickly in circles. He disregarded everything, the only thing he wanted was to make sure Jin Ling was fine.

“JingYi! Have you thought about what I asked you?” Wei WuXian interjects, taking into consideration what 'script' Jin Ling was referring to.

“What? I do not have time for your games,” JingYi's voice was filled with scorn.

In contrast to his bad memory, there was one incident in Yi City that Jin Ling might be talking about. Although he couldn’t remember the exact lines Lan JingYi used, just remembering the fragments of it left him laughing.

While everyone stared at him laughing out of place, Lan SiZhui asks, “Senior Wei… um… do you know where Young Master Jin is?”

“Of course, I do,” he says. “He left for Lanling.”

“Lanling?” Lan JingYi's interest was piqued. “Seriously? When did you know? Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Someone from his sect came just now,” Wei WuXian answers.

“He left because of that?!” Lan JingYi's voice was too loud.

Wei WuXian asks him, “What do you think? He left because of you. And noise is forbidden in the Cloud Recesses.”

“I know!” JingYi wasn’t at all controlling the volume of his voice. It was a good thing Lan QiRen was somewhere visiting some sects.

“You broke a lot of rules tonight! Congratulations!” Wei WuXian claps a hand on his shoulder, “So tell me, why did you even buy that kind of thing for him? Judging from the number of your sect rules, I’m sure there’s something there that prohibits making fun of others.”

“What nonsense are you saying now? I bought that because…” JingYi pauses, Was it truly just a joke? Or because he really couldn’t find anything else to give Jin Ling?

SiZhui clamps his mouth shut. If this was what he thought it was, he would not interfere. Not after knowing that Jin Ling wore that hairpin and that he was upset because of JingYi being so dense about it.

“And why you keep cleaning up his room and took care of him when he was ‘sick’?” Wei WuXian continued.

“Sick? How did you—”

 _Eavesdropping, that’s how._ Ignoring his question, “Lastly, did you find out why now, you could just disregard the rules and regulations of your sect?”

“…” JingYi doesn’t answer, but his eyes told him he understood.

The other sect disciples were in a daze. Whenever they saw Lan JingYi and Jin Ling together, the two were always bantering and bickering, always fighting and not willing to lose to one another. They found it strange that JingYi earlier was so worked up when he found out Jin Ling was missing. And now, with Wei WuXian’s words implying something, it looked like there was something between them.

Wei WuXian smiles, “If you know, go give him your forehead ribbon. He’s so upset whenever he does something, and you don’t have a clue what it means. It’s a waste of his efforts!”

Lan JingYi runs, not even curious as to what Wei WuXian meant when he said Jin Ling was doing some things. Right now, his top priority was to tell him.

“JingYi, it’s almost nine! Can’t you wait until tomorrow?!” Wei WuXian cups his mouth with his hands as he shouts.

“I cannot!” JingYi shouts, riding his sword and flying to Lanling.

“JingYi!” SiZhui was about to come after him when Wei WuXian shakes his head.

“JingYi-xiong! Be careful!” the other disciples cheer him on, but he doesn’t hear them anymore.

“Let me through! Jin Ling!” JingYi shouts, trying to get past the guards.

“Listen, kid—” a guard holds him down.

“Call him out! Now!” JingYi pushes him away.

“What’s the ruckus?” an intimidating voice interrupts. Jiang Cheng.

“Sect Leader,” the guards immediately let go of JingYi, bowing to Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Cheng eyes JingYi up and down. It wasn’t the face he could easily forget. “What’s your business here? I clearly remember your sect has a sleep and wake routine.”

“I need to speak with Jin Ling,” he says, not at all afraid.

At the mention of his nephew, Jiang Cheng touches his ring, “You couldn’t wait until tomorrow?”

“Please. I’ll accept my punishment afterwards,” he pleads. When he looks up, his face changes momentarily before facing forward, as if he saw nothing.

Jiang Cheng looks behind him, catching a shadow by the window. He ponders for a few moments. Apart from this particular disciple being the one who called Jin Ling a young mistress, Jin Ling’s abrupt return and the urgency in his voice, he must be one of the boys that Wen Ning truly cherishes. And since he wanted to talk to Jin Ling at such a time, it must mean that at some point while he was at the Cloud Recesses, they became friends.

Although Jiang Cheng guessed the last part wrong, the rest was true. “Talk to him tomorrow,” he turns to one of the guards, “Prepare a room for him.”

“Sect Leader Jiang, there is no need—”

“I seem to remember that your sect does not let people in after nine. You’ll have to wait until 7 in the morning. If you want to sleep in the streets, that is also fine…” Jiang Cheng says, but omits the part that he didn’t want Wen Ning to worry.

“Thank you, Sect Leader Jiang,” JingYi bows.

“Do not forget you will be punished for barging in here at this hour tomorrow,” Jiang Cheng says.

After Jiang Cheng delayed his punishment so he could continue his alleged romantic affairs with Wen Ning, Jin Ling walked the quiet hallway, careful not to disturb the silence. If his uncle found out he was sneaking around he would punish either him or the person he was seeking.

He searches the rooms one by one, until he arrives at the farthest one. _This is the one._ He stares at the door for a few moments. What is there to say? Lan JingYi not noticing meant the possibility of them having feelings for each other never crossed his mind. He wasn’t a cut-sleeve after all.

 _But… Wei Ying told me he wasn’t a cut-sleeve before. JingYi came all the way here… to speak with me, right? Probably even breaking who knows how many rules?_ He remembers how Wei WuXian shamelessly told tales of how he and Lan WangJi ended up together, from how in the past he was only interested in girls, to the misunderstandings he purposely made to preserve Lan WangJi's good reputation. The most memorable one to Jin Ling was when Jiang Cheng caught them hugging under the tree and burning incense in their ancestral hall when he told him Lan WangJi was only a friend, aside from the incidents he saw with his own eyes that made him certain what they were. The rumors did indeed have some truth in them, but due to the missing details, even the slightest, any who listens to them is often led astray. The archenemies everyone knew fell in love with each other and not even the people who were there at a point in time and saw it personally like he and the disciples, knew the whole story.

Shaking his head slightly, he scolds himself for remembering most of the stories. As much as he denied he was interested in knowing, even retorting a few mean things to Wei WuXian, vividly remembering the details meant otherwise. It was almost impossible for a proper person like HanGuang-Jun to fall for the opposite like Wei WuXian. _Just how on earth did he seduce him?_ _And to top it off, with HanGuang-Jun falling in love first?_

Come to think of it, when JingYi and he first met, they were not on good terms and even fought a lot. Before he could even finish thinking how this and the former's miracle love story are the slightest bit similar, he stops himself. _I’m… making excuses._ And another thought crosses his mind. He didn’t remember how many times, but he does remember how JingYi always defended SiZhui. It was reasonable, given that they were best friends and he already told himself earlier: JingYi wasn’t a cut-sleeve.

But still, for some unknown reason, people almost often assume the worst, even the most absurd possibilities. He always gets heated up whenever Jin Ling throws thorny remarks at SiZhui. Immediately, his mind followed that path, his expression growing darker and darker. _Did he come here to tell me he… Lan Yuan…_ He clenches his fist, that ray of hope as to why JingYi came all the way to Koi Tower was extinguished in an instant.

“Ha—" he lets out an almost whisper of a sarcastic laugh. If JingYi was indeed a cut-sleeve, why wouldn’t he fall for his kind, righteous and leader-figure best friend who grew up with him and shared every little thing they had now? Jin Ling holds back his tears desperately. He knew he lacked some of SiZhui's good qualities, but couldn’t help asking the question, Why Lan Yuan?

“So what, you come here and you’re not even going to come in and say hello?” a voice vibrates from the wall.

Jin Ling had no time to reclaim his reasons and calm himself. He opens the door, “What are you doing here?” his tone was ice.

“Why do you think I’m here?” Lan JingYi asks him, catching a hint of red in his eyes. He stands from the sofa, walking a little closer to Jin Ling.

“You come here and cause trouble for me by seeking your own death and you can’t even answer me properly?!” Jin Ling raises his voice, the faint tremble in his voice made imperceptible by his usual arrogant tone. It would be far too troublesome if JingYi died without at least making amends.

JingYi fumes, interpreting Jin Ling's sentence wrong. “What, would my death be too troublesome for you? And I could say the same to you! You left without telling me properly!”

Jin Ling, “Who said I needed your permission to come or leave the Cloud Recesses? Who do you think you are?!”

“Stop playing around! You know what I am to you!”

Jin Ling stares at Lan JingYi, speechless. Not that he was surprised that Lan JingYi knows, but that because he figured this out only now. At the same time, now that JingYi put it into words, he was afraid of what would follow.

“Huh?” JingYi’s eyes widen. It would seem that he too did not have the courage to say something so bold, if not for the spur of the moment and no matter how he looked at it, this person is the current LanlingJin sect leader, so he shut his mouth. What Wei WuXian made him realize was stuck in his throat, his heart thumping wildly.

Unfortunately, Jin Ling was waiting for the next words that didn’t come. Disappointed, he lowers his gaze, chuckling bitterly, “Hmph. Really now? But what's the use if I’m the only one feeling this way, hm? And let me tell you. I don’t need your pity.”

Wei WuXian definitely wasn’t joking around when he told him Jin Ling left because of him.

“Jin Ling—" he staggers a step forward.

Jin Ling turns his back on him, “Sleep for now. I’ll try my best to keep my uncle from breaking your legs,” his tone somewhat lifeless.

Why is he always like this? Why won’t he spare a second to listen to what I have to say?

Lan JingYi regained his strength from being annoyed, catching up in quick and soundless strides, “Who said you’re the only one?!” he yells.

Jin Ling barely had the time to react to the sound and turn around, when a flash of white suddenly appeared in front of him. It disappeared, followed by the feeling of a line of softness on his forehead, slightly tightening. In less than a second of distraction, he felt the knot behind his head.

“What the—" he murmurs before strong hands grip both his arms, cutting his speech short. His sight spins before settling on JingYi, who was too close.

He knew what the forehead ribbon of the GusuLan sect signified. Trying to cover up the frantic beating of his heart, he glares at Lan JingYi.

Lan JingYi pulls a face, his expression almost funny, as his lips and brows twitch in irritation. Before Jin Ling could say something, JingYi reaches out and his vision turns black in a split of a second.

“What do you think you’re—,” he reaches for the ribbon that turned into a blindfold, but JingYi grabs both his wrists.

“Such a temper! Can’t you suppress your anger at every little thing?” JingYi retorts.

“I’ll remember this!” he threatens, trying to break out of JingYi’s grasp. _Why didn’t my uncle make me do handstands? He’s too strong!_

“What makes you think you have the right to decide how I feel?” Lan JingYi’s voice pulls him back to the present. It had a strange seriousness, so unlike the tone he usually uses when bickering with him or Wei WuXian.

“What?! Are you saying I’m wrong?! Go on, tell me! Am I wrong?!” Jin Ling, with all his might, even jumps while shaking off his grip, forcing Lan JingYi to put all his strength to maintain his hold.

But Jin Ling wasn’t weak. Lan JingYi had no choice but to embrace him tightly to keep him from moving. “You…” he hisses angrily.

“I hate you! I hate you! Why did it have to be me?! And to think…” he sobs, trailing off and gradually losing the strength to resist.

To think that it was not Lan JingYi’s fault that he began to love him. And that he couldn’t tell him in words.

Jin Ling falls limp, his arms hang uselessly to his sides. The moment he did, the tears dropped heavily. A hand caresses his back, just like it did once. Jin Ling cried harder, like he hated it even though he wasn’t resisting anymore. JingYi grimaces, but one wouldn’t be able to tell if it was because Jin Ling’s cries were hurting his ears or just because Jin Ling crying hurt him.

Out of nowhere, Lan WangJi and Wei WuXian appear in his mind. Lan WangJi’s patience paid off. But what about him? He was different from him. And there was SiZhui.

Being too preoccupied with his thoughts, he did not notice the arms that embraced him disappeared, and the hands that were on his back just now transferred to his face. He only came to his senses when a warm, plush sensation settled on his lips.

Meanwhile, Lan JingYi, who initiated the kiss, also had tears running down his cheek, though not as many as Jin Ling’s. This time, he was the one who made Jin Ling cry, yet the reason why he wouldn’t believe him he had yet to discover.

Pulling away, he pulls the forehead ribbon all the way down Jin Ling’s face so it’d hung down around his neck. “I’m sorry,” he says, his face full of sorrow.

Jin Ling’s tears stop. He saw Lan JingYi cry before in Yi City. But this time was different: he was quiet. And he even kissed him! “What did you… just do?” he whispers almost to himself.

“Showing you how I feel? What do you want me to say? You won’t believe me no matter what I do,” JingYi sighs, stepping away.

Jin Ling snatches his hand. “Stay and explain to me properly,” he orders.

Lan JingYi pouts, “Who are you to demand such a thing? You were the one who fell in love first, why don’t you be good and explain why on earth you left without telling me?”

“Even an idiot could tell how I feel based on my actions. Did you need an explanation for such an obvious thing?” Jin Ling retorts.

“With how much you pick a fight with me everyday, how could I?” Lan JingYi sighs, tilting his head in resignation.

Jin Ling turns his head away, “What about you?” he snorts, “It wasn’t Lan Yuan?”

Lan JingYi whips his head to him, blinking in surprise, “What? Why are you dragging SiZhui here?”

“Wasn’t he the one you like? You’ve always been nice to him. Didn’t you come here to tell me that? Because you want to be nice?”

JingYi rolls his eyes. _So that’s why he’s being a brat! He’s jealous!_ Of course, he was nice! SiZhui was his best friend! “Then, let me ask you. Who would even rush to Koi Tower in the middle of the night, breaking rules just to say that he likes someone else? To whom did I give my forehead ribbon? Who did I hug and kiss just now? Was his name Lan Yuan?”

Jin Ling gulps, his cheeks a vibrant pink. He doesn’t answer, pursing his lips tightly. He then sighs. What Lan JingYi said was the truth from start to finish and he looked so stupid for even making up such a possibility.

“See? Tell me who’s the idiot now,” JingYi finishes with one of his remarks that wasn’t really GusuLan-like. “I came all the way here, risking my life and of all theories, you came up with that?” he mumbles.

“It wasn’t impossible!” Jin Ling protests.

“Why do you make up stories only to hurt yourself? You really are a young mistress,” JingYi chuckles.

“You! Can’t you say something nice?!” Just as Jin Ling was about to stomp towards him, JingYi does first, locking him in a tight embrace.

“If I say anything else, you might not like it. So, I’ll just do this instead,” JingYi whispers.

Jin Ling submits, closing his eyes and savouring his beloved’s warmth. _What a weird twist of fate. I once told Wei WuXian to have fun being cut-sleeve._ Who knew it’d be really fun?

“Lan JingYi,” Jin Ling taps his shoulder, “I can’t breathe, you’re too strong.”

“Sorry,” Lan JingYi releases him, a little embarrassed.

“I didn’t tell you to let me go,” Jin Ling says.

“You said you can’t breathe,” Lan JingYi frowns. “But, but, but! Let’s not fight. I came all the way to clear things up with you, not fight with you.”

Jin Ling nods, “You should sleep. I know you’re sleepy.” He glances at JingYi, whose eyes were already half-lidded.

“Fine,” Lan JingYi says, reaching for his hand and walking towards a certain direction.

“What are you doing?!” Jin Ling twists his wrist but wasn’t able to break free.

“We should sleep, right?” Lan JingYi looks at him, perplexed as to how his actions warranted such a reaction.

“B—But why are you taking m—me with you?!” Jin Ling stutters, glancing at JingYi’s back where the bed was.

“We are lovers now. Is it not fine to sleep together?” Lan JingYi answers casually.

“What the—Lan JingYi, you! If we sleep in the same bed, who knows what would happen! And we’re only fifteen!” Jin Ling blurts out so fast that even he was stunned at his own words right after.

Lan JingYi’s mouth hangs open as he drops Jin Ling’s hand. After a few moments, his face turns a deep shade of red. “J—Jin Ling… d—did you just…”

Jin Ling grits his teeth, his face dyed the same colour as the other because of embarrassment, apparently being the only one who thought of such a thing. “L—Listen, I—”

“Jin Ling,” Lan JingYi says slowly, eyes closed, as if restraining himself, “I was just… I was not thinking of… How could you… give me such ideas…”

“W—Wait! My uncle… if he finds out, you will not only end up with broken legs, but much, much worse!” Jin Ling changes the subject, stepping back.

Lan JingYi, seeing the slightest sign of escaping, lunges forward, catching Jin Ling’s shoulders, “I will not do anything to you, not until I earn your uncle’s approval. Not until you let me.” His eyes were locked onto Jin Ling’s, his tone firm and serious.

Jin Ling could only nod. Lan JingYi smiles, releasing him. Jin Ling turns his back on him just as he speaks, “Good night.”

“Good night,” Jin Ling says. Lan JingYi whirls around, just as the door closes.

“I love you,” Lan JingYi says, even if Jin Ling wasn’t there anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all for reading ♡


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